Bored and Talkative......A Recipe for Diaster

Lazy Voice Post ft. Meems

2011-05-23T09:25:00.000+01:00

I liked the accent voice post so much, I decided to do a random voice post as well.

Have a listen

Accent Challenge

2011-05-23T08:55:00.000+01:00

Thought I'd jump on the bandwagon and do this challenge as well. It was pretty fun. I got the instructions from Ms.Behavings' post Enjoy!

Listen!

I Actually Did It

2011-05-18T08:45:00.000+01:00

So I finished work.

I packed up my stuff.

I got on a plane.

Yes my move is almost complete. I say almost because all my stuff is being shipped over and won't be here for another 8 weeks. It feels a little strange, but in a good way. I do miss my family though. Meems is doing very well. She is enjoying herself.

It was so hard trying keep the date I was arriving a secret from my husband. He had an idea that I was coming in May but I wouldn't tell him the exact date. It was so hard because we tell eachother everything. But he liked the surprise. I've been back for a week now. And I just about slept off my jetlag.

Now the real adventure begins.

Last Day

2011-04-28T10:45:00.001+01:00

So today is my last day at work. It feels weird. I'm excited about the move but also a little scared. I'm gonna have to start all over. But I'm ready for the challenge. It's Meems' last day at nursery today too. They are throwing her a farewell party. She's very excited about the move too. She's been telling anyone who will listen that she is moving to America. She's looking forward to starting "big" school as well. I think she'll adapt very well.

It's only really now dawned on me how much I'm gonna miss my family. I know that half the time I can't stand them but I still love them. It's gonna be weird not seeing them everyday. But I gotta start living my life for me. I've been following my mum all over the world since I was 4. Whenever she wanted to pick up and leave town, I was right behind her, whether I wanted to or not. Now I have my own family to take care of. And they can always come and visit me and vice versa.

It helps that I'm moving to a place that I know. I've been there before and I'm comfortable there. I have family and friends there. It'll be strange at first but it will also be very wonderful. I can start from scratch. Leave the past behind me and move forward. Begin a new chapter in my life.

I'm ready....

Drama

2011-03-22T12:20:00.003Z

I really try to be a reasonable person. Especially when it comes to Meems' father. The man makes litte to no effort to see her and spend time with her. Yet I'm not hostile towards him, I have never stopped him from seeing her when he asks.

A few weeks ago he came to see Meems and told me he was going to Jamiaca in June and wanted to take Meems with him. I had to remind him that we were moving to Florida in May and wouldn't be here. I told him almost a year ago about my plans to move to the states. At the time he didn't seem interested. He didn't even say anything when I told him. I guess he didn't think I was serious.

So anyway, he goes on to say how it isn't fair that his mum won't get to see Meeems. I said that's not my fault. If he made an effort to see Meems and spend time with her then maybe I would feel more comfortable with her leaving the country with him. When I lived with my sister, he lived less than 5 minutes away. And yet he never came to see Meems very often. And I told him this. He tries to tell me about how he doesn't have a say in her life. He didn't have a say about where she lived, where she went to school, etc. So I asked him if he bothered to come with me when I was looking at nurseries? I reminded him about the time when I asked him to help me when I was looking for a place and he said no.

I reminded him that if I didn't call him, he would never know what was going on. He doesn't pick up the phone to call her at all. I told him that she is 4 years old and he doesn't know her. I asked him when her birthday was? No answer. What's her favourite colour? No answer. Favourite food? No answer. How do you spell her name? No answer. And he even admitted that I was right. I told him, he hasn't looked after her on his own overnight in the UK so how was I supposed let him take her to Jamaica for 2 weeks. He tells me that IF he had to look after her he would do it. He says he doesn't have to do anything because I do it all. Yeah he really said that. He doesn't have to physically spend time with her and take care of her because I do that already. If I wasn't around then he would step up to the plate and do what he had to do. WOW!!

At that point I was about ready to dropkick his ass. But Meems was there, so I was trying to calm myself. She could tell I was upset by the tone in my voice. She kept telling me to not get "grumpy" with her dad. So basically he admits he's a deadbeat but doesn't think that it's wrong. It doesn't matter that he doesn't play an active role in his daughter's life because her mother does it all. I didn't know whether to laugh, cry or scream. But that wasn't the worse part.

So he's getting ready to leave. He's saying bye to Meems. He says to her that he's leaving now because her mummy upset him. He hugs her and then says that she may never see him again. Seriously?! That's something to say to your 4yr old daughter? So he leaves and now Meems is upset. She asking me why did I make her daddy leave? Why did I upset him? How do I explain this situation to a 4yr old? I try my best and tell her that I'm upset that her daddy doesn't spend much time with her. She calms down a bit. When my mum comes home from church, Meems runs to her and says "Mummy upset my daddy and made him leave".

So basically it's all my fault. *sigh*

Post #250

2011-03-14T13:05:00.002Z

I couldn't really think of a title for this post.

Since my last post, I've moved back in with my mum. It's temporary until May. Just so I could save money on paying rent and use that towards my move.

I can now admit that I am a hoarder. I have way too much stuff. I had bday cards from my 18th birthday. I had bank statements from 2003. It was ridiculous!! But I got rid of all the crap I didn't need and pack up all my stuff. Even with throwing out things, I still have alot of stuff. Now I just have to arrange shipping it all over.

Time is actually going by pretty quickly. March is halfway over. I've got a month and a half left at work. I managed to arrange for my cousin to take over my job once I'm gone. She better not make me look bad.

I'm very excited about the move. And so is Meems. I was a little nervous that she may not be as excited as me or maybe not understand it fully. But every morning she asks me "Are we going to Florita (no I didn't misspell it, that's how she pronounces it) today?" She has told everyone that she is moving there. She's very excited. She can't wait. I'm glad because that takes a lot of stress off me worrying.

I'm in the process of planning my second wedding. As the first one was more of a spur of the moment thing, not all of our families were there. So the second one is taking place in St. Vincent in December. My mum has taken over the planning, which is fine with me. My uncle is going to conduct the ceremony in his church. And we've already sorted the reception venue. My mum and her two sisters are all caterers, so that takes care of the food and my wedding cake. As my mum is from St. Vincent, most of our family still live there. According to my mum I'm the first of the grandchildren (and there are loads of us) to get married, so the family is very excited. I've already found the dress I want. And I've picked my bridesmaids and their dresses too.

My 10 year high school reunion is in July. Wow I feel kinda old lol. They have planned a whole weekend of events but I don't think I'll go to all of them. Although I haven't seen some of these people in 10yrs, I'm not trying to spend my weekend with them. It should be interesting though.

Happy New Year......Random Rubbish

2011-01-18T16:00:00.003Z

Happy New Year folks!!!! Hope you all had great holidays. I was very glad to see the back of 2010 and am very excited for what 2011 has in store. So what has been going on in my little world???

I got married!!!!!!! Yep on the 1st of January 2011 on the beach. It was a very small ceremony but it was wonderful. If you're friends with my on facebook you probably already saw the pictures. The weather was great, everyone enjoyed themselves. Everything went without any problems, very surprising as we planned it all in 11 days. Yep 11 days!!
I'm starting to get prepared for my big move back to the states. I've handed in my notice at work. I gotta start packing the things I want to take with me and get rid of all my junk. I'm very excited and can't wait to start this new chapter of my life.
Some a**hole hacked one of my email accounts and sent spam to everybody and their momma in my contacts. Luckily not all of them went through and hopefully the ones that did get delivered into spam folders. But if you got a email from me please delete it.

Okay so maybe not that much has been going on in my little world......

Happy Holidays

2010-12-29T14:30:00.002Z

Over 2 months with no post. That is a shame.

Oh well.....

I hope you all had a great Christmas with your families. I spent mine planning my wedding. Yeah I'm getting married on New Years Day. Planning a wedding in less than 2 weeks is crazy and that is exactly what I did. I flew to Florida to spend Christmas with my fiance. And during my holiday we decided that we didn't want to wait till next year to get married. And the 1st of January 2011 seemed like a good date so we went with that. So we got our marriage licence, arranged the venue for the reception, etc... We were very blessed that everything came together as easily as it did. I managed to find a wedding dress in one day. Tried a few on and found one that fit perfectly, needed no alterations or anything. Walked right out of the store with it. I had great friends helping me and I got everything I needed. It wasn't easy and there were times when we both got stressed out but we resolved those issues very quickly.

When you're planning things in a hurry, you tend to forget things, like scheduling a wedding rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. But there is still time for that. We also forgot to choose a ring bearer, but luckily our friend agreed that her son would do it. The man above was definitely on our side and everything is coming together nicely. The weather is warming up and should be very warm on Saturday.

I am very excited and I couldn't ask for anything more. Of course not everyone feels the way I do. But you are always gonna have someone who has their own opinion on the things that you do. And not everyone is gonna support you, but I'm not gonna focus on the negative. I am too blessed to be stressed.

I hope you are enjoying your holidays. I wish you all a wonderful New Year. Mine will definitely be one I will never forget.

Absolutely Disgraceful

2010-10-19T11:20:00.001+01:00

Okay so I guess it's safe to say that 30 day challenge BOMBED! I was so close to the end too. Oh well.

So what has been happening in my world for the last month:

Mum had her 60th Birthday party. It was great. My grandmother flew over from Miami and my boyfriend came over too. There were loads of people, everyone had a good time. It was stressful at times, but I'm glad she enjoyed herself.
I got engaged...I still can't believe it. It's all very exciting. It didn't happen the way he planned it, but I think it was perfect.
Meems turned four last month. I was so occupied with mum's party I completely forgot to organise one for Meems. I managed to put one together quickly. She had alot of fun, even though she only had 2 guests.
I went to Holland to meet some of my fiance's family. It was alot of fun. We stayed in this really nice hotel. Strolled through the red light district. Took loads of pictures. His family were very nice. Love them.
I turned 27 last week. Didn't do much: went to work and hung out with the family. Mum made me a massive chocolate cake and Fonso (my fiance) sent me some beautiful flowers. Meems made me a lovely card and decorated a bday cupcake for me.
I got a new tattoo last week as well. I really am addicted to them.

Okay that's it for now...better get back to looking like I'm working hard....

Day 23 Something That Makes You Feel Better

2010-09-01T14:45:00.001+01:00

Meems - that kid is shear entertainment. She brightens my mood all the time. Can't be sad around Meems
My boyfriend - he knows just what to say to make me smile. Sometimes he doesn't have to say anything at all
My family - even though we don't always get along, I can say that they have been there for me when i really needed them
Ice cream - yeah i comfort eat sometimes. Haagen Dazs cookies and cream ice cream makes everything better
Doing things for other people just because i can - a trait of being a Libra, I like to help people.
Hugs - I like to be held
Kisses - I'm a big kissing fan...if it's done properly

There's probably more but can't think of them right now.

Day 22 Something That Upsets You

2010-08-31T10:45:00.000+01:00

There are a few things that upset me:

Liars - I despise liars. Especially when people lie about small things. If you're not gonna be honest then just don't talk to me.
Cheaters - In my opinion there is no reason to cheat on someone. If you don't want to be with that person then break it off. If you're not happy, either try to make it work or leave. Cheaters are selfish and greedy. They are only thinking about themselves and what they want, and to hell with everyone else.
Rude ass kids - When I see kids being outright disgusting to their parents it bugs me. I see kids hitting their parents, cussing at them, all sorts of foolishness. If I ever thought about doing that to my mum, I wouldn't be alive today. These kids get away with too much.
Gossips - Why must you take it upon yourself to discuss and dissect someone else's life? Why don't you focus on your own shit?
Fake people - Don't say one thing to my face and something completely different behind my back. Be real and say what you gotta say. If I don't like it, then that's on me.
Know-it-alls - People who swear they know everything really irk me. Those people that will try and force their views on you. People who think their opinions are the only ones that matter.
Arrogance - There is a difference between being arrogant and being confident. I hate when people think they are better than anyone else.
Racism - No one should ever be made to feel worthless because of their colour

I could keep going but I'll just piss myself off lol

Day 21 Another Moment

2010-08-30T14:20:00.000+01:00

November 2004

I can't remember the exact day. I remember my mum was catering an event in Reading. I was supposed to go with her but she was getting on my nerves and I said I wasn't going. She had friends going with her anyway. I remember my god mother calling me early in the morning to tell me my mum collapsed at the venue and had to be rushed to hospital in an ambulance. She wasn't sure what had happened or what hospital she went to. I found out my mum had a mild heart attack. One of her other friends had accompanied her to the hospital and called me. It was scary because she was so far away. I didn't drive and had no way of getting all the way up to Reading. One of my mums friends drove me up there a few days later to see her. She looked so pale. She had to have an angioplasty done and had to stay in hospital for a few more days.

I felt really bad that I didn't go with her. I guess I felt like if I was there I could have done something. She was so far away and on her own. Definitely one of the scariest moments in my life.

Day 20 This Month

2010-08-29T10:00:00.001+01:00

This month has been a bit stressful. I've been planning my mum's 60th birthday party. Really it was her idea to throw herself a party. I was just going to help her. I have ended up doing most of the work. I ordered and sent out the invitations. Helped her plan the menu. Looked for and booked the venue for the party. Then there's the decorations and the food. As my mum is a chef she's decided to cook the food herself, so I'll be helping with that. My sister said she was going to take care of the decorations, but her and my mum are kinda not really talking at the moment so I won't hold my breath on her helping out.

Work has been alright. It's had its busy days and it's quiet days. I've had to deal with some annoying people but no more than usual.

Everything else in my life is alright. Can't complain.

Today is my brother's birthday. So Happy Birthday Don!!!!!

Day 19 Something You Regret

2010-08-28T14:30:00.001+01:00

I try not to regret anything.

Sure there are things that I wish I didn't do or things I did do, but then maybe my life might have turned out differently. And although it's not perfect, I'm happy with the way my life is right now. It could be better and then again it could also be a whole lot worse.

So I'll just be thankful for all the things I do have.

Day 18 Your Favorite Birthday

2010-08-28T14:05:00.000+01:00

I don't think I have a favourite. So maybe I'll just go with some memorable ones....

I had a great 16th birthday. My mum threw me a really cool sweet sixteen party. It was really fun. Even though she hired a really terrible DJ and my friends went to their cars and brought in Cd's to play. We had alot of fun. And I got my first ride in a limo that night.

I got my first tattoo for my 19th birthday. It was a present from my sister.

I went clubbing for my 20th birthday. Went with a group of friends and my boyfriend at the time. We hung out in the VIP area all night. It was fun.

I went out to dinner with my family and friends for my 21st birthday. We went to TGI Fridays and my mum baked a massive "21" chocolate cake that we took with us. Then they made me stand on a chair in the middle of the restaurant holding the cake, while everyone sung me happy birthday. I think I developed my love of cocktails on that night. I had a tray that had shots of different cocktails in it. Everyone was surprised I drank them all and wasn't drunk. Yeah I'm a lush.

I haven't really done anything special for my birthdays since then. My boss has taken me to lunch. A friend has taken me to dinner, but nothing special. I think I'll wait till I turn 30 and have a huge party.

Day 17 Your Favourite Memory

2010-08-28T13:38:00.000+01:00

I'm making up for the missed posts this week.

You can probably guess what my favourite memory is....Yep the birth of Meems. I can't help but talk about her. My face lights up at the mention of her name. Although she's a handful and can be rude at times, I wouldn't change her for the world. She keeps me entertained and is a joy to be around. There is never a dull moment with Meems around.

Here she is 1 day old

And here she is at 3yrs

She doesn't even look like the same child. September 26th 2006 will always be one of my favourite days.

Day 16 Your First Kiss

2010-08-28T13:15:00.001+01:00

It happened in 8th grade.

His name was Rafael.

He wasn't my boyfriend but we did like eachother.

It was very awkward and sloppy.

I didn't like it at all. And it was a year before I kissed another boy.

Thank goodness it got better with time.

Day 15 Your Dreams

2010-08-28T13:10:00.001+01:00

I dream of raising healthy, happy, well rounded children
I dream of moving to Florida and marrying the love of my life
I dream of becoming a talented chef
I dream of becoming a great midwife
I dream of clearing all my debt by the end of the year
I dream of finally finishing the planning for my mum's bday party- this ish is stressing me out
I dream of leading a happy healthy long life
I dream of being a positive influence on the people in my life and the new people I meet
I dream of travelling the world
I dream of only getting married once
I dream of having a big family
I dream of being successful in whatever it is I choose to do
I dream of having a long lasting, loving relationship with my future husband

Day 14 What You Wore Today

2010-08-28T12:54:00.003+01:00

I'm slacking again...

This should have been posted on Monday 23rd August 2010. So this is what I wore on Monday:

Day 13 This Week

2010-08-22T20:05:00.000+01:00

This week hasn't been very exciting. I did the same stuff I always do: go to work and come home.

I had to relax my sister's hair on Monday, so I stayed at my mum's house. Had to listen to my sister complain about contributing towards mum's 60th bday party. She called my brother and told him about the party and asked if he was gonna contribute. He damn near had a heart attack. I knew he was gonna cry broke, that's why I didn't bother calling him. He's only good for asking for money, not giving it.

I had to work on my day off again on Thursday, because my boss arranged an appointment with our underwriters and forgot I wasn't supposed to be at work. So I came in to work just to find out that they cancelled the appointment again for a second week in a row. But I did get to leave early on Thursday and I've got Thursday and Friday off next week.

My nephew had to have dental surgery on Friday. He had five of his baby teeth extracted. Poor thing. Hope you get better soon Dace.

I had a massive headache most of the weekend. No matter what I took for it it wouldn't go away. I need to check my blood pressure.

I ventured out to Croydon town centre by myself on the bus on Saturday. It's not that far from my house, but I never went by myself before.

Well that's my week. Not very exciting huh?

thirteen down, 17 to go......

Day 12 What's in Your Bag

2010-08-20T10:00:00.006+01:00

Lots of junk:

My wallet
an umbrella
bottle of water for meems
snacks for meems - gotta keep stuff for the train ride home
2 notebooks - 1 meems draws in to entertain herself, the other has planning stuff for mum's party
post from my mums house
pens
body spray
my house keys
my work keys
my mum and my sister's house keys - i feel like a janitor with all these keys
tissues
wipes for meems
lip balm
lip gloss
oyster card
hand sanitiser
stamps
nail clipper

Day 11 Your Siblings

2010-08-19T10:00:00.002+01:00

Ok I won't cheat like I did on the parents post. I have one half sister and one half brother on my mums side. I've heard I have siblings on my father's side but I don't know about them.

My sister is eight years older than me and my brother is 10 years older than me. They are both pretty much the same: selfish, rude and obnoxious. They are more interested in what people can do for them, I think they get that from mum.

I wasn't really very close with my sister growing up. I guess with the age gap and everything, we didn't really have much in common. She moved back to England when she turned 18, so I pretty much grew up without her. We got a little closer once I moved back to London. She can be very opinionated at times. She swears she's always right. I guess she figures she's older and has more experience. She has a habit of talking down to people, like they're not capable of making their own decisions. She gets that from mum too. I love my sister, I even like her sometimes. She can be a real cool person at times and we do get along, but then there are those times where I want to smack her. But she's not all bad. She definitely helped me and Meems out when we were practically homeless a couple years ago.

I'm not close at all to my brother. He never came to live with us in America, I'm not sure why. So I didn't grow up with him either. He doesn't call me unless he needs money. That's the only time he calls anyone. He's rude and ignorant most of the time. He's also a violent thug. He smokes weed and I think that's what messed him up. He swears the world owes him something.

Don't my siblings sound great? Sometimes I swear I can't be related to them. Sometimes I can't believe I'm related to my mum. But despite their faults they're still family and I love them. ~~I think~~

Day 10 What You Wore Today

2010-08-18T13:25:00.000+01:00

I swear I tried to do this post like 2 days ago and kept forgetting to take a picture of what I was wearing. I don't dress up for work unless I really have to, so most of the time I'm in jeans and a t-shirt, like today.

Day 9 Your Beliefs

2010-08-13T21:20:00.001+01:00

I believe that I wouldn't be where I am and who I am if the Lord wasn't watching over me. There have been plenty of times when I've wanted to give up but he brought me through it all. And he continues to do so. And I thank Him profusely for it.

I believe everyone deserves a second chance. A third and a fourth are out of the question.

I believe that people can change, if they really want to. But I have yet to actually see it happen with certain people I know.

I believe Meems is the greatest, naughtiest, strangest 3 year old I know.

I believe cheating is just wrong. And there is no situation where it is excusable.

I believe that everyone should experience falling in love.

I believe cooking helps me relieve stress.

I believe my family are all crazy ~~and I'm really adopted~~

nine down, 21 to go.....

Day 8 A Moment

2010-08-07T11:05:00.001+01:00

I'm not exactly sure what I'm supposed to post here.

Is it just a memorable moment from my life?

Well I could tell you about yesterday when my boyfriend sent me flowers. Yeah I'm not the first chick to have her man send her flowers but it was a first for me. No one has ever sent me flowers before.

I was on the phone with a client and there's a knock on the door. This dude walks in with a vase of beautiful lilies. Lilies are my favourite flower, I absolutely adore them. At first I'm thinking he's in the wrong room. But he says my name. I start smiling instantly. I figured my boyfriend was up to something, because he was quizzing me about where I work. But I didn't expect to have flowers delivered 2 hours after we spoke on the phone. It was a great surprise. It made me feel special that he decided out of nowhere to send them to me.

I'm usually the one that likes to surprise people with "just because" gifts. It's nice to be on the receiving end of that.

Day 7 Your Best Friend

2010-08-06T13:24:00.003+01:00

It's hard for me to make friends. I'm very quiet and shy when I'm around people I don't know. I don't go out much so I don't really meet new people. And I haven't made that many new friends since I moved here 9yrs ago.

But the few friends I have made are great. I'm very secretive so I don't like too many people around me. I've got a handful of really good friends and that's all I need. These are people I can trust and who I can talk to. People I know will be honest with me and not just stroke my ego and they know I'll do the same for them. I can have open and honest discussions with them. I can rely on them and they can rely on me.

I don't think I can say I have a "best" friend. I just have really great friends who I love.

seven down, 23 to go.....

Day 6 Your Day

2010-08-05T20:55:00.001+01:00

Okay so I guess I'm supposed to blog about my day.

Well I woke up 15mins later than I was supposed to. I had to fight with Meems to eat her breakfast. I realised I left my belt at my mum's house and so I've been pulling up my jeans all day. I don't know how chicks can wear jeans with no belt. It was annoying. Good thing my shirt was long and so was my cardigan. I had to rush out the house to make my train on time. As usual I didn't eat breakfast ~~i never do~~ so I felt sick all morning.

My boss had the day off today, so I was alone in the office. Came in to 13 messages on the voice mail. Only 3 of them were of people actually leaving a message. Then had to deal with a rude ass debt collector in Sweden, threatening to sue one of our clients because our claims department hadn't paid her hospital bill. Turns out they did pay it and the hospital sent the cheque back. Then my screening system decided to run extra slow, so it took me twice as long to do the medical screenings. Today just felt like it was dragging on.

Then I went to pick Meems up from nursery and we had the following conversation on our way to the train station:

Meems: Do you love Victoria? (her friend at nursery)

Me: Uhh yeah I love Victoria

Meems: Do you love Shayla?

Me: yeah I love Shayla

Meems: Then you don't love me

Me: Yes I do. I love you the most

Meems: You can't love my friends and me

Me: I love your friends but I love you the best. You're my favourite

Meems: I have a bad feeling about this O_o

Me: about what?

Meems: you

Me: what did i do?

Meems: you can't love lots of people

Me: do you love me?

Meems: yes

Me: do you love daddy?

Meems: yes

Me: do you love nanan?

Meems: yes

Me: that's lots of people

Meems: *laughs*

This kid is hilarious.

After work, I went to my mums house to show her the invitations I ordered for her party and to write them up and address them.

And now at 20:55 I am getting ready to put Meems to sleep. Usually that means I'll fall asleep too. So Good night blog world.

six down, 24 to go

Day 5 Your Definition of Love

2010-08-04T11:30:00.000+01:00

Okay so I started off really well.....

I don't know if I can actually explain what I think love is. I think there are different degrees of love. There's the love you have for your family, your SO, your friends, your job or hobbies etc. So maybe I'll break it down to make it easier for me to explain.

The love I have for my family is unconditional. I've blogged about my family before, so y'all should know they are a dysfunctional bunch. But no matter how wrong, evil, selfish they are I still love them. I will still go out of my way to help them, even though sometimes I think they wouldn't spit on me if I was on fire. Sometimes I think I'm just stupid for doing it, but they are the only family I have, so I gotta put up with them.

The love I have for my daughter is out of this world. She is the most important thing in my life. Her needs and wants come before my own. I would rather starve before I see her go without. No matter how I'm feeling, I see her little face and everything is right with the world. She's at the age right now where I can do no wrong in her eyes. She loves me no matter what. I would do anything I had to for her.

The love I have for my boyfriend is extraordinary. Although neither of us is perfect we love each other unconditionally. We love each other flaws and all. We have both made compromises and sacrifices for our relationship, but we're realistic about it. We know not everything is going to be perfect and when things go wrong, we work them out. We don't try to change each other. We encourage each other and lift each other up. That's what I think a relationship should be. But on the other hand, you shouldn't be so blinded by love that you put up with nonsense. You have to make sure you're happy because if you're not how are you supposed to make anyone else happy. Love should never make you feel worthless. Love should make you feel like you're priceless. Love should make you feel like you are the most beautiful/handsome being on earth. Love should make you feel like you can do anything. Yeah love SHOULD feel that way, unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way for everyone. I wish it did because everyone deserves to feel that way.

Okay I feel like I've rambled enough in this post.

Five down, 25 to go....

Day 4 What You Ate Today

2010-07-18T18:12:00.003+01:00

Okay this isn't gonna be a long blog post. My sister, her fiance and my nephew came to visit me today. It's the first time they've been to my new flat since I moved in. So I cooked Sunday dinner for them. I was up at 5:45am and was pretty much cooking and cleaning most of the morning. There wasn't any lunch because I ate breakfast pretty late and had dinner early on in the afternoon. I'm sure I'll be having seconds of dinner later on.

Breakfast:

Ham and cheese roll

Plantain

Baked beans

Dinner:

Roast lamb

Roast potatoes and carrots

Broccoli

Sautéed Courgettes

White Rice

Gravy

Dessert:

Apple crumble and custard

Cookies and Cream ice cream

Day 3 Your Parents

2010-07-17T12:45:00.002+01:00

Okay on to day 3.

I've spoken about my parents on my blog before. Not really sure I wanna type out a whole new blog post about them.

So I'm gonna make ya work a little. The post about my father is here
And the one on my mum is here

I kinda feel like I'm cheating........ not really.

Three down, 27 to go....

Day 2 Your First Love

2010-07-16T11:05:00.001+01:00

Hmmmm......

For the sake of this post, my first love will be referred to as "Eerste Liefde"(it's dutch) or Eerste for short.

I have dated Eerste on 2 different occasions. But I didn't realise he was my first love until the second time around. That may sound strange. The first time we dated I was around 14. At that age I didn't really know what love meant. I think I was more in love with the thought of being in love. He was my first boyfriend and the person I gave my virginity to. He was kind and caring and he loved me. But I did something horrible to him. I broke up with him and dated his best friend. Horrible isn't it? How could I say I loved him and hurt him so badly. I'm still not proud of myself for that. But let's move on.

So when did I realise he was my first love? When I realised that I have never felt the way I feel about him with anyone else. Anytime I think of my future he is there. I couldn't envision my life without him. He's caring, he's understanding, he's loving, he's intelligent, he's dedicated, he's ambitious, he's a wonderful father, he's a wonderful person in general. I've had 3 serious boyfriends in my lifetime and I have never loved them the way that I love Eerste. I didn't think about a future with any of them. I didn't think about marriage, children etc with any of them. They never made me feel the way that Eerste does. He's the first person I have ever wanted to dedicate myself to (other than the Lord of course).

I guess it also helps that he feels the same way about me. He takes me as I am, flaws and all. He hasn't tried to change me into something I'm not. In fact he's made me into a better person. He's always there to build me up when i feel broken. He encourages me to be the best I can be. He listens. He doesn't judge me. Sure we have our rough patches but we always talk through them. He's easy to talk to. He's broken down the walls and barriers I put around myself. He's helped me to be more trusting and open.

Okay I could go on, we'd be here all day.

Let's just say I'm definitely an advocate for second chances.

Two down, 28 to go....

Day 1 Introduce Yourself

2010-07-15T11:05:00.001+01:00

Okay so here goes my first blog post of the 30 day challenge. This will probably be stuff you guys have already read but just humour me here.

Hi my name is Carlene. I'm 26. I'm a Libra.... ok seriously.

I'm the youngest of 3 kids.
I was born in London and have lived in St. Vincent, Florida and New York. Because I was raised in the states my accent is all kinds of crazy. The English folks can hear the American in me. The Americans can hear the English in me. But it does make me stand out. It draws alot of attention at work. People usually think I'm in some call centre in America.
Speaking of work, I work for a travel insurance company. I have done for the past 8 1/2 years. I won't say I love my job but I don't hate it either.
I have a 3yr old daughter named Mehalia (Meems for short). She's a handful, but I am definitely enjoying motherhood.
I'm currently in a long distance relationship which is great, exciting, stressful and irritating all at the same time. But I wouldn't change it for the world.
I'm a qualified chef but I have never officially worked in the food industry. I love cooking though, just don't know if I'd wanna do it for a living.
I'm addicted to tattoos. I only have 3 so far but I'm itching to get more.
I can be quite secretive and it takes a long time for me to trust people and let my guard down.
I have a wicked temper. I've calmed down over the years but it's still bad.

I can't really think of anything else.

One down, 29 to go...

Blog Challenge

2010-07-14T14:00:00.003+01:00

So my blog has been looking pitiful lately. I'm down to 1 post a month. Just despicable.

So I'm gonna join MsBehaving in her 30 day blog challenge. It'll be good, seeing as the topics are already set out, so I should have no problem. So I say now.

So the schedule goes like this:

Day 01 – Introduce yourself
Day 02 – Your first love
Day 03 – Your parents
Day 04 – What you ate today
Day 05 – Your definition of love
Day 06 – Your day
Day 07 – Your best friend
Day 08 – A moment
Day 09 – Your beliefs
Day 10 – What you wore today
Day 11 – Your siblings
Day 12 – What’s in your bag
Day 13 – This week
Day 14 – What you wore today
Day 15 – Your dreams
Day 16 – Your first kiss
Day 17 – Your favorite memory
Day 18 – Your favorite birthday
Day 19 – Something you regret
Day 20 – This month
Day 21 – Another moment
Day 22 – Something that upsets you
Day 23 – Something that makes you feel better
Day 24 – Something that makes you cry
Day 25 – A first
Day 26 – Your fears
Day 27 – Your favorite place
Day 28 – Something that you miss
Day 29 – Your aspirations
Day 30 – One last moment

I think I can stick to it. Maybe...... Hopefully........

Anyone else wanna jump on the bandwagon?

Why I Don't Drink Red Wine...

2010-07-07T11:45:00.001+01:00

I was reading Jazzy's recent post about a horrible hangover. And I straight away asked if she was drinking red wine. Then I briefly mentioned that red wine was the devil cause it messed up my ankle. And she wanted to know what happened. Seeing as I only managed to scrape together one post last month I figured I'd post the story here.

It was 2002. It was Tupac's birthday. My boyfriend at the time was a huge Tupac fan and wanted to go out to celebrate his birthday. So we went to a bar with another friend of ours. Now normally I don't drink red wine. I don't like the taste of it. I'm not too much of a wine drinker anyway. But we had a bottle of red wine. Somehow I managed to drink the whole bottle by myself. Don't ask me how, cause I really don't know. But I was feeling alright. So we hung out for a while and then they took me home. None of us drove at that time, so we took the bus. It was a bit of a long bus ride and I started to feel a little tipsy, but I was insisting that I was fine. So when we got to my stop, they asked if i was okay and if I needed help stepping down. I said I was fine. I walked down the steps from my seat just fine. Then I went to step off the bus and fell. And I mean I fell hard. Twisted up my ankle, fell flat on my face. Good thing it was night time and the bus wasn't too crowded. I was too drunk to be embarrassed anyway. So they help me up and as soon as I get to my feet, I throw up. Luckily I didn't get it on anyone. But I just kept being sick. And then I kept apologising to my boyfriend. Not sure why. So anyway they walk me up to my flat. At that time I was living with my mum and my sister. I get in the house and rush to the bathroom to be sick again. I left everything in the bathroom. My jacket, my handbag, my phone, my keys. I crawled to my room and went to bed. The next morning, my mum asked me what the hell I was drinking. I reeked of alcohol and vomit. She found all my shit in the bathroom. And I still had to get up and go to work. My head felt like a jack hammer was going through my temple. I felt horrible. My right ankle was swollen like a baseball. I could hardly walk. I got my mum to wrap it up for me and limped my way into work. I don't know how I made it through the day at work. My ankle has never been the same since. It just gives out at a moment's notice. It has caused me to bust my azz on a number of occasions.

I used to pride myself of being able to hold my liquor. I could drink all night and wouldn't wake up with a headache. One bloody bottle of red wine laid my azz out. And I refuse to touch the stuff again. Every time I see a bottle of red wine, I remember falling off that damn bus. But it hasn't stopped me from drinking alcohol completely. I'm too much of a lush to give up the liquor lol.

Random Rubbish

2010-06-22T13:35:00.001+01:00

I finally moved the remainder of my things that I had stored in my mum's garage. I really didn't think I had that much shite. There are boxes everywhere, it looks like I just moved in all over again. And I haven't had the time to unpack it all. Not really sure where it's all gonna go anyway.

I collected Barbie dolls when I lived in Florida, so I have quite alot of them, all still in their boxes. I'm afraid to unpack them cause I know my kid is gonna wanna open them all. She managed to spot one high up and kept asking me if she could see it. Then it was "Can I open it?" "You're supposed to share with me" She's lucky it wasn't a collectible one and I had two of that doll anyway, so I relented and opened it for her. Now she has her eyes on another one.

Two weekends ago, I helped my mum cater a birthday/retirement party. I usually don't like working with my mum because she can be a bit Gordon Ramsay-ish but she had an accident the day before and fell down her stairs so she needed my help. The party went great, everyone enjoyed the food. As my mum wasn't 100%, I pretty much had to take over. I was so tired. I was up from 6am that Saturday and didn't get back home until 4am on Sunday.

My kid never ceases to amaze me. Now whenever she gets told off for something, she sulks and says that nobody loves her. So I had to explain to her that she gets told off because i love her and want her to know the difference between right and wrong. I swear the things kids pick up in nursery.

So summer has arrived....well for the time being anyway. English weather can be finicky. This whole week it has been very hot. And you know what happens once the sun comes out...clothes come off. I was walking with Meems yesterday and saw this woman cleaning her front yard in her bra. I know it was hot but it's never THAT hot. And the rest of the week is only going to get hotter, I don't think my eyes can take any more.

So the World Cup has started. Even though I am a fan of football. I'm not a die hard fan. These England fans are ruthless. When you're winning they love you. But when you lose, they are ready to burn you at the stake. The England squad has gotten so much bad press lately. Okay yes they were shite in those first two matches but damn, cut them a little slack. I hope for the players sake, England win their game today or they may as well emigrate to South Africa.

Big Mistake

2010-05-23T00:50:00.002+01:00

I have a nasty habit of never asking for help. I don't know why that is. I guess I have just been conditioned to do things on my own. This is a problem because then people think I don't trust them to help me or I don't trust that they would want to help me. I would rather try to do things on my own and if I can't, I'd probably give up before I admit I need help. But if you needed my help, I'd be there in a heartbeat. Very silly isn't it? I know it is, so why is it so hard for me to change that mindset? Why is it so hard for me to ask a loved one for help? Especially when I know that this person would bend over backwards for me?

Random Rant

2010-05-12T11:30:00.001+01:00

Normally I'm a reasonable person. I can take constructive criticism. If you have a problem with me, I'll hear you out, provided you come at me the right way. Come at me sideways and I will shut down. Push me too far and I will snap. Last night my mum decided to come at me sideways and push me too far. Without making a long story longer, here's what happened in a nutshell:

My mum called me, I didn't answer the phone ( i was in another room), she proceeds to leave me a voice message stating that I never answer my phone when people call me. I'm always on the phone to my boyfriend. I'm letting him rule me. He's a control freak. I'm not thinking in the best interest of my child. I'm selfish and only thinking of myself. There was more. All of this stemmed from me not answering my phone the ONE time she called me. Now if she was calling me all day and I never answered, then I can understand her being mad. I called her straight back but she didn't answer her phone, she was too busy leaving her rant on my voice-mail.

So I call her on her house phone and she picks up. And she proceeds to go into her rant again. So she's yelling in my ear and I'm yelling back. She says things, I say things. And then before I say anything I can't take back, I hang up.

Now I'm not stupid, I know that my mum wasn't 100% supportive of my decision to move back to Florida. She may have said she was, but my mum says one thing in your face and something totally different behind your back. Now if she would have come at me like an adult and talked to me, then this could have been resolved. But she chose to get childish and start hurling insults around. I'm too old for this drama. I've put up with it for most of my life. I'm not gonna do it anymore.

End of rant....

Random Rubbish

2010-04-30T12:40:00.000+01:00

As previously mentioned, I have finally moved out of my sister's house. I am so glad I finally got off my ass and did something about my housing situation. Now I've got my own space and I love it. And it puts a little distance between me and the family, which is greatly needed. I have managed to unpack most of my stuff. But I've got some things in my mum's storage that I'm getting out next week, so there will be more to unpack. What joy!! The commute to work isn't bad at all, Meems has adjusted to the longer train ride very easily. She has more time to harass people on the train and force them to listen to her stories. lol

When people heard I was moving to south London, the first thing out of their mouth was, "she's moving to be with her man". Ummmm why couldn't I just want a change of scenery? It was hilarious because my boss said the same thing to me, and he was like the love of my life was down there. I looked at him and said "no the love of my life is in Florida". It was so funny to see his mouth drop. Nosy bugger. Even the movers I had helping me said the same thing. And when I said my boyfriend was in the states...that sparked a whole new discussion.....

Everyone seems to have the same reaction when they hear I'm in a long distance relationship. One of the movers was like "How are you so sure he doesn't have some next girl over there while you're here?" "Do you really think he's staying faithful while his girl is across the world?" Why is it so hard to think that people can be faithful in a long distance relationship? Yes it's hard when you can't be around that person as much as you like. Yes it gets lonely sometimes, but if you are actually committed to that person then there shouldn't be a problem. And IF my boyfriend did cheat on me, why is it any of your concern? It's not like I'm gonna come running to you for comfort. It doesn't matter if we live continents apart or lived 2 minutes away from each other. If someone is going to cheat, they will. You just have to trust your partner, if you don't then what's the point of your relationship?

My mum called me today to tell me she saw my dad in town and that he asked for my phone number. I didn't see the point in him wanting it seeing as I've given it to him on 2 different occasions (and the number hasn't changed) and he hasn't used it once. And the last time I spoke to him on the phone, he didn't seem interested in talking to me. Maybe he did it to save face in front of my mum. Either way I won't hold my breath waiting for him to call.

Moving

2010-04-26T13:30:00.001+01:00

So this past Saturday I finally moved into my new flat. And I even managed to get some unpacking done. I have mentioned I hate unpacking right?

It's feels great knowing that I'm in my own place. I will be eternally grateful to my sister for putting me up and letting me stay with her for so long but it was definitely time for me to go.

Meems is liking the new place as well. Well she's not really bothered. As long as all her toys were there, she didn't care where we were.

Well that's it for now. Work is kicking my ass right now, with all the volcanic ash disruption. Laters folks.

It Is Finally Done

2010-04-14T19:38:00.002+01:00

After 2 years of talking about it, it has finally happened. I signed all the paperwork and have the keys to my new flat. I'm so excited. I mean I was grinning so much when the estate agent handed me the keys, i wanted to jump up and down. It's a shame it took me 2 years to get here but i'm here and i am so happy. Now just comes the part I hate: moving and unpacking.

Should be back with some great moving stories.

That is all.

Relationships

2010-04-04T10:45:00.001+01:00

Relationships are tough. And it doesn't really help when it's a long distance relationship. Not being able to see that special person everyday can be tough. You have to be very secure in your relationship and trust your partner. It's quite easy for people to whisper in your ear and put doubts in your head. Make you question your partner's every move. The stress of it can make you irritable and spark arguments for no reason or blow things way out of proportion.

This happened last night while I was talking to my boyfriend. Without making a long story longer, I did something that at the time I didn't think was wrong but looking back it was kinda disrespectful. This sparked a huge row and lots of things were said which weren't meant. I think we are both stressed with this situation we find ourselves in and I felt horrible for starting the whole thing. But we managed to talk everything out. It took us about 4 hours (yeah i'm working off 3 hours of sleep) but we discussed things like mature adults and got everything out in the open. We both have things that have happened in our pasts that affect the way we deal with things. But I'm glad that we can talk about things and we are both dedicated to making this relationship work.

Random post I know.

My weekend

2010-03-15T20:25:00.000Z

I had a pretty eventful weekend. On Saturday I went to view another flat. It was great, I loved everything about it. It was close to the train station so I wouldn't have far to travel. It was spacious and the bathrooms were gorgeous. I'm a sucker for a nice bathroom. Now I just gotta go through all the paperwork and hopefully soon I'll be posting about my new home. I'm really excited.

Sunday was mother's day here in the UK. My sister's fiance decided to cook for us all. He made mushroom and prawn linguine, it was really good. My sister is having the ceilings in the house plastered. So we spent sunday clearing up and moving things around. My sister's fiance went up into the loft to store some things. I was outside in the back garden. I hear my sister yell out and call for me. I come running in the house, her fiance almost fell through the ceiling. Luckily only his legs fell through. I get upstairs and see this gaping hole right above my bed. It was hilarious. I said if we filmed it we could have gotten £250 on You've Been Framed.

My Adventures in Florida

2010-03-08T14:35:00.000Z

I finally went on holiday. After delaying it for how many years. I finally plucked up the courage booked my tickets and flew out to Florida. I was gone for 2 weeks. It was great, granted the weather wasn't as warm as I would like it, but it was still warmer than London. I got to see some old high school friends, visit my old high school, visit family, and rekindle an old flame. Don't ask how that last one happened, I still don't know. But I have now gotten back together with my first high school boyfriend.

It sucks obviously because we live in different countries. But it feels right that we should be together. He gets along great with Meems, and I get along with his daughter. They both love each other. His family loves me, my family loves him. Now the only thing between us is the bloody Atlantic Ocean.

Everyone who knows me, knows I don't like London. I tolerate it but I always wanted to move back to Florida. I never did it because I got complacent, and then I had Meems. But now I really want to go back. Not just because of him but for myself as well. When I went back to Florida I realised how much I missed it. When I went back to where I used to live all the memories came flooding back. So I have made a decision that I would like to move back to Florida. All my life I have followed my family and done what they wanted. Now I think it's time for me to do things for myself and follow my heart. And this is what I want to do. It helps that my family have been supportive of my decision. I didn't think they would be but they surprised me.

So the next thing on my list of things to do: Plan my move to Florida.

Random Rant

2010-01-19T14:25:00.002Z

Excuse me while I rant for a bit.

I hate when people come to me for advice but never take it. And then when things go wrong, they wanna come back to me and ask for more advice. Well I gave my opinion but you refused to listen to it and look where that got you. I'm not saying I'm always right, but common sense would have told you to do what I said.

Okay so you were unhappy in your current relationship but is that a reason to cheat as many times as you did? I didn't really want to know about your dirty laundry but you came to me for my advice. But you never took it, so was there really a point in asking me? Maybe you just needed someone to talk to. So you tell me things aren't going so well in your 10 year relationship. You also say that you have met someone else. I tell you, you need to sort out your business at home before you move on to the next one. You are still living with your "fiance", still sharing the same bed. How does that look? But you don't listen to me, you carry on. Down the line you come to me again, tell me that your "side piece" was a little aggressive towards you. Red Flag But you don't break it off. Then you tell me that you are going to come clean to your "fiance" about the "side piece". But you don't him everything. You tell him you slept with "side piece" once. Not that you were carrying on a relationship with dude. If you are gonna come clean, then tell the whole truth or keep your mouth shut. Anyway "fiance" still wants to be with you and wants to try and make things work. You come to me again. I ask what do you want to do? You say you want to give it a try, you guys have a history and a child together. I say you will have to give up the "side piece" all together and focus on your relationship. Do you do that? NO!! How the hell are you supposed to be working on keeping your family together when you're off with the next man. What kinda bullshit is that??!! Sometime down the line you finally decide to break it off with the "side piece". He doesn't take it so well. Starts badmouthing you to his ex. What she has to do with it I don't know. Now you got people talking your shit in the street. He calls you an unfit mother and all sorts. You then take it upon yourself to go and fight with them both. You get into a physical fight with them? What if one of them had really hurt you? Pull out a knife and stabbed your ass. Where would your son be then? What if they try to be spiteful and call the police and report you for assault? I understand your frustration but that was not the way to handle it. They probably deserved to get their asses kicked but that's not the point.

It occurred to me that you never once considered what kind of position you were putting me in by telling me your dirty little secrets. Although I wouldn't snitch on you, I still have to look your "fiance" in the face knowing what I know. But I won't say this to you, because I don't want you to feel like you can't come and talk to me.

But sooner or later this is gonna wear on me and I'm not gonna be able to take it anymore. Hopefully you will pull your finger out and fix up by then.

Meems

2010-01-15T14:30:00.002Z

It seems that I can talk about her all day long. No matter what kind of day I've had, as soon as I see her I'm happy. She never ceases to amaze me. She says some random things sometimes. Here's some examples of Meemisms (yeah my new word for things Meems says):

"Momma you're my hero" she said this out of nowhere while we were watching tv one day.
"Well you're not my hero anymore" she said that right after i told her she couldn't watch what she wanted.
"Are you going to share with me?" she says this every time I'm eating. Doesn't matter that she ate just minutes before.
"Pink is my favourite colour in the whole world"
"Hey Mommy, What's up?" she picked that up from me
"Well that's your problem" also picked up from me. I really need to watch what i say around her.
"I don't care" that was her response when her uncle told her to move away from the tv before she went blind
"I didn't say nothing" this is when she says something she's not supposed to and didn't think I heard her
"Are you proud of me?" when she was being potty trained, every time she went to the toilet I told her I was proud of her. Now I have to keep saying it, every time she goes.
"Oh Pickles" her catchphrase when things don't go her way

There are probably more but I can't think of them right now.

1st Post of 2010

2010-01-14T15:00:00.000Z

Happy New Year.
Yeah I know it's 2 weeks late, don't watch that!!
Hope everyone had a great holiday season.

Mine was alright. I did cook Christmas dinner by myself. It came out very well. I was very pleased. I guess those catering courses did come in handy. Meems was spoiled rotten. There are more toys than I have space for. But she and my nephew enjoyed it. I rang in the new year at home, eating junk food and sipping cocktails. I consumed way too much alcohol during the holiday season. I hadn't had a hangover in years. But I had one on New years day. I think I put too much vodka in my blue lagoon. Over all it was a great holiday season.

I haven't bothered making any new year's resolutions. I never keep them anyway. I know what I need to do this year and hopefully procrastination doesn't get in my way.

My mum is still away. Found out some frustrating things while she's been away though. But I shouldn't be surprised, I usually always find out about her dirty laundry while she's out of the country. My mother is straight scandalous. I can hardly believe it sometimes. But this is all just more incentive for me to move as far away from my family as I can.

This really wasn't much of a post. I have got to do better for 2010.

Laters.

Christmas is days away......

2009-12-22T13:05:00.001Z

And I still haven't finished my shopping yet. I would have done it today but my boss asked me to come into work, so it looks like I will end up one of the last minute shoppers. I know what i want to get so hopefully it shouldn't be too stressful.

My mum managed to get the money for her ticket and is now chilling in Bermuda until the end of January. She managed to get money from my sister and my dad, I was very surprised. But at least I didn't have to give her any money.

I only just put my Christmas tree up yesterday. And although it doesn't look as great as my previous trees (I wasn't really in the mood to put it up. I did for the kids) Meems thought it was the "best tree ever!!" Gotta love 3yr olds.

It has finally stopped snowing. Although we haven't had as much snow as the East Coast of America, it was bad enough for us. But luckily this time the whole of London didn't shut down like it normally does. And I managed to only bust my ass on the ice once. It was totally embarrassing, and now my thumb, my shoulder and my hip hurt.

As my mum is away this year, me and my sister will be cooking Christmas dinner. Well I'm sure I'll end up doing more of the cooking. There's not gonna be that many of us so there won't be too much to cook. Here's what I'm planning:

I'll do some turkey legs for my dad (no one else wants turkey but him)
Roast lamb
Macaroni pie
Don't know if I want to roast a joint of pork or have ham
Roast potatoes
Brussels sprouts (can't stand them but dad and brother in law like them,)
Rice (my brother in law doesn't eat rice & peas and I ain't cooking two pots of rice)
Not sure if I want parsnips, might do a few
And some other random veg

Okay so just typing that out looks like a lot of food. I think I may roast the meat on Christmas eve. That's the longest thing to cook so if I get those out of the way, everything else should be a breeze. Not sure what tp have for dessert. I have a Christmas cake my mum made before she left. Might get some apple pie or something.

Christmas Party

2009-12-04T12:00:00.000Z

I work for a small company. There aren't that many employees, so we don't have a company Christmas party. So I had to make do with Meems' nursery Christmas party yesterday. I'll be honest it was better in some parts than last years one. As I'm bored and have nothing better to do I'll compare the two parties for your amusement.

Food:
Last Year: Curry Goat, Fried Chicken, Rice etc
This Year: Sandwiches, Sausage rolls, mini pizzas etc
Now what would possess you to cook curry for a kids party? This Year wins in the food department.

Music:
Last Year: DJ playing RnB, Pop, and Reggae
This Year: DJ Playing Christmas Carols
I don't know who's cousin they got to DJ last year but dude was playing some slack ass Reggae music. Things I wouldn't listen to around my mother. Now you can't be playing slackness like that around kids. I was heated about that. So this year wins again.

Entertainment:
Last Year: A little side note I was late for last year's party so I don't know what happened before I got there. They had a raffle and a bouncy castle.
This Year: They had an entertainer come in and play with the kids. They played musical bounce, musical statues, pass the parcel and she made them balloon animals. They even made us parents play musical chairs. Then Santa Claus came and gave the kids their presents. I'll say both parties were okay on entertainment, I missed half of last year's so I can't judge it properly.

Meems wouldn't stay still long enough for me to take a good picture of her. But she seemed to have fun and that's all that matters.

Random Rubbish

2009-12-02T15:50:00.001Z

Okay so I only managed one post for the whole month of November. Very sad. I really need to do better. Anyway here's what's been happening in my world lately.

Since my last post, my brother was arrested by the police. Where did they find him? At his girlfriend's house. I did tell you she threw him out right? Well apparently she needed someone to watch her son and walk the dog, so he went. While he was there the police showed up. There were about six of them, handcuffed him and took him to the station. He was detained there all day and then released with the charges dropped. I have nothing to say on this matter. He is a grown man and like I said before; I can't help him unless he wants my help.
Last weekend I went out with TomGurl to celebrate her birthday. I had fun. I can't remember the last time I went out dancing. I don't really get out much. But it was fun, the music was good. Although there was a drunk that wouldn't leave our group alone. He was trying to give us all glasses of champagne, mine was put right back on the counter. I don't know you like that dude to be accepting drinks from you. Then there was the dude that was dancing with me and decided it was a good idea to kiss me on my neck. He got the deepest side eye and I just walked off. I always seem to attract dudes that wanna molest me on the dance floor. But overall I had a great time.
My mum wants to go to Bermuda this month. Does it matter that she just came back from Barbados in October? Or that she doesn't have any money to buy her ticket? Well to her it doesn't. My uncle is retiring form the police force there and they are having 2 parties to celebrate. And they want all of the family to be there. But they aren't forking out to buy any one's tickets. I already told my mum I'm not paying for it. I paid for her ticket to Barbados in October and back then she wanted to catch 'tude cause I wouldn't give her spending money. My mum really likes to live beyond her means. I'm glad I haven't inherited that trait.
Christmas is a little over 3 weeks away. I haven't done any shopping at all. I think I'll try and do it this weekend. I hope the adults in my family know they aren't getting any presents this year.
The year is almost over and I haven't done anything that I set out to do at the beginning of the year. The two main things were:

I was supposed to sign p to start my midwifery course. I got sidetracked with other things and haven't done that.
I should have found my own place and moved out of my sister's. I've become complacent and haven't done that.

I have snapped myself out of my complacent mode and am going to move out of my sister's place. I can't take much more of her moodiness, anyway.
Also I have decided to move down to South London. Of course I haven't told my family this. I think it will be good for me. It is alot cheaper to rent down there. And I'll get some space from my family. Lord knows I need it. I need to make a fresh start for myself and Meems.

Okay I believe that is it for now.

Family Drama

2009-11-13T11:50:00.000Z

It is safe to say that I don't really communicate with my brother. I rarely call him and he only calls me if he needs something. Whenever something happens between him and his girlfriend they call my mum. And she in turn calls me. Why? I don't know. What exactly does she want me to do about it? My brother is 10 years older than me, he's a grown ass man. He should be able to handle his own shit. I don't want to get involved, but my mum keeps telling me about his drama.

A couple weeks ago he and his girlfriend got into an argument and she threw him out of the house. Apparently the police were called as well. As I wasn't there I can't say what happened but I do know that my brother has been violent with her in the past, so lord only knows what happened this time. So anyway my brother left before the police arrived. So right now I believe the police are looking to "talk" to him. So right now he is renting a room from his friend's dad. Do I feel sorry for him? No I don't. He got himself into that mess. My brother had his own flat. He lived 2 minutes away from his girlfriend's house. They lived on the same street!!!! There was really no reason to give up his flat and move into that girl's house. Then he would start complaining that all his money went to her and she didn't do anything. Well if that was the case then you should have stayed in your own spot. Then they would argue, something would pop off and he'd get flung out. Then they'd make up and do it all over again. Every time something went wrong they'd call my mum and then she'd call me and my sister.

So after this last episode my mum is calling me asking if I've called him and expecting me and my sister to look after him. My sister went and bought him food and stuff. Against my judgment I bought him some new bed linen and stuff. I tried to be nice and call and check on him but he's in this pit of self pity and i can't be bothered anymore. I invited him over for dinner, he didn't come. My sister told me that he's said he's depressed. I can understand he's sad, he and his girlfriend have been together for 7 years. But if he doesn't change his attitude and get some help for his anger they have no chance. But my brother's problem is that he never thinks he's wrong. He always blames it on someone else. Nothing is ever his fault. So I am tired of talking and can't be arsed to chase after him anymore. If he wants to sit around feeling sorry for himself then so be it.

To the outside world, that may seem harsh, but you can't help someone that doesn't want your help.

I'm Around

2009-10-21T12:00:00.000+01:00

I know I'm slacking again.

Well since my last post here's what's been going on:

Three weeks ago I learned that my grandmother (on dad's side) passed away. I wanted to travel to Barbados for the funeral but it wasn't financially possible at the time. My mum, my sister and my dad went. Apparently there was lots of family drama, enough drama to make my sister come home a week early.
Last week I turned 26. I don't really feel any different. I wasn't really that excited about my birthday this year. I don't know if it was the news about my gran, or that my family wasn't here. But I had a good day anyway. Got taken out to dinner on Saturday night so it was cool.
Got a pay rise at work. Definitely happy about that, especially in this economic climate. The extra money will definitely come in handy. I think my boss is finally starting to realise how valuable I am to this establishment.
Meems' tantrums are still outrageous, but I think she is starting to realise that it's not getting her anywhere. Yesterday she threw a fit because she couldn't call her dad on the phone. He was driving at the time so I told her she couldn't call him at that moment and would have to wait. She started to cry and scream. Did I mention we were at the train station on our way to school? She cried and carried on for the whole 15 minute train ride. Then when we were walking to her school, she turns around and asks me if I'm her friend. I told her no because she was rude to me. She started sulking. Got to school her teachers asked why she looked so sad. She told them that she was rude to me and upset me. So when I was leaving she comes out and gives me a hug and apologises. I couldn't really be mad at her after that.

Temper Tantrums

2009-09-30T13:00:00.000+01:00

I have repeatedly been told that I was little terror when I was younger.

Apparently I was brutally honest: a lady came by our house to do my mums hair and she didn't smell quite right. So I made it my duty to ask her if she didn't have a bath that day.

I answered back: I went to a convent school in St. Vincent, so when you got in trouble you would get smacked with the ruler. Apparently I got in trouble and when it was my turn I told the teacher "My aunt says no one is to wash their hands pon me." Well she went back and told my aunt and my aunt said that's right she did tell me that.

I didn't take hints very well: I was out with my mum and misbehaving. So to warn me that I was pushing it, she pinched me. I blurted out (loud as hell) "What did you pinch me for? Don't you know that hurts?"

I get reminded of my bad behaviour almost daily. So it's no surprise ( to everyone but me) that my daughter is a little terror. Like mother like daughter, right? Take yesterday as an example: she got a scooter for her birthday and wanted to ride it to school. I explained to her that she would have to ride it all the way there and that I wouldn't be able to carry her. Maybe it was my fault for trying to reason with a 3 year old? Anyway she was alright riding it from home to the train station. When we got off the train, she didn't want to ride it anymore and she didn't want to walk either. She expected me to carry her. I told her I couldn't carry her, the scooter, her school bag and my bag. She started screaming in the street. I mean top of her lungs screaming. It was deep.

People have told me I have the patience of a saint, when it comes to my daughter. I don't think I do. Trust it does piss me off, but blowing up at her and yelling isn't gonna help the situation. I guess people just deal with things in different ways. She's at that age where she's gonna test boundaries and see how far she push it. But I'm running out of ways to deal with these tantrums. I've ignored her until she's stopped. I've taken away privileges. I've done what I possibly can but they don't seem to be easing. Maybe I'll just have to wait it out.

If anyone has any suggestions, they will be greatly appreciated.

TMI Tuesday After A Long Hiatus

2009-09-29T12:45:00.000+01:00

1. Have you used put anything edible on (or in) your partner's body and then eaten it?
Yes. You don't need me to go into detail do you?

2. Have you ever had an AIDS test due to reasonable suspicion or hyperactive imagination?
I have had an AIDS test but not because of any suspicious activity. I just think it's something everyone should do.

3. Have you ever fantasized about someone else other than your partner while you were engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation?
No. If that happens, then I don't need to be having sex with that person.

4. Have you ever engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation while in a moving car? A car being driven by someone not engaged in the sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation?
No can't say that I have.

5. Have you ever had sex so many times or for so long that one or both people involved runs dry?
Yes that has happened before. Not a comfortable situation.

Bonus (as in optional): Name 5 things an unplanned (or planned) visitor would find in your bedroom?
As I have a toddler, everything is hidden in my room. You won't find anything naughty out in the open. So you'd probably find: my bed, my closet, my barbie collection, my daughter's toys, and laundry.

Long Time

2009-09-28T12:55:00.000+01:00

This one post a month really needs to stop. I'm going to try to do better.

This past Saturday was Meems' 3rd birthday. I can't believe she is three already. I threw her a little party at McDonalds. Most of her nursery friends came. They all had a great time. I'm really pleased she enjoyed herself. She got spoiled rotten as usual. She got more toys than I have space to store them. I guess it's time to go through the old toys and start giving things away. Overall Saturday was a good day. My mum made her this huge layer cake. I didn't taste any until I got back home, only to realise my mum soaked the chocolate cake in cherry liqueur. She was making another cake for a wedding and must have forgotten to keep Meems cake separate so they all got soaked.

On Sunday I got to hang out with TomGurl. She's cool peoples, she managed to get me out of my comfort zone: North West London. We had lunch and then took Meems to the park. Never again will I get on a roundabout. Meems just walked off like it was nothing. I had to sit for like 5 minutes to get my bearings and even then I was still dizzy. I swear I felt like I was hanging upside down. Yeah, I'll leave that to the kids. I'm an old woman, my body can't take it.

I'm going to my first concert in like 4-5 years. Should it matter that I haven't heard of the artist before? I got people helping me on that. I'll be ready by the time the concert rolls around (next week). I hope.

Not much else is going on in my little world. Family still driving me nuts. But what else is new.

My New Tattoo

2009-08-28T17:14:00.002+01:00

I was too lazy to edit the previous post and add the image in. More like it was messing up my whole post just to add th epic. So here it is. Tattoo number 3:

It's on my lower back on the left side.

Another Catchup

2009-08-28T10:50:00.000+01:00

Okay so this blogging business is getting ridiculous. But I'm glad I'm not the only one falling off.

Not much has happened since my last post. Let's see:

I had to fire my summer job kid. I was off for a week because Meems was sick. I don't know what happened between him and my boss but there was drama. When I got back my boss was like"He has to go". I don't know why he was telling me, it wasn't my idea to hire the boy in the first place. But he didn't seem too bothered about it. He was going on holiday with his friends anyway.But he was starting to take the piss though. He'd return form lunch 20mins late. He's supposed to start @10am, he called me one morning @9:40am to say he had a doctor's appointment @10:30am. Okay so I'm thinking he'd come in after that. Boy never showed up and didn't call either. Then comes in the next day like nothing. He said after the appointment he had a headache and decided to stay home. So you couldn't call and say something? I think he knew his time was up.

Meems was sick for a week. It was a little scary, as some kids had been sick at her school with suspected swine flu. But luckily she wasn't seriously ill and is now back to her usual charming self.

I got another tattoo. I went with my sister and we both got one. I already have plans for a couple more. They really are addictive.

My boss is away on holiday for a week. So I'm left to man the fort. It hasn't been too bad so far. Granted it's only been a couple of days, but hopefully it doesn't pick up too much.

I finally upgraded my phone. I'm in love with the No.kia N97. It's great. My mum calls it my mini computer. She's now hinting that she wants my old phone.

My sister's cooking rota has been in effect for over a month. But I'm the only one that has cooked on all of my designated days. My sister hasn't cooked a thing in weeks. I never really saw the point in it in the first place. I knew it wouldn't last.

This weekend is the last bank holiday of the year. I was thinking about going to Nottinghill Carnival but I can't deal with the rowdy people. The last time I went was about 7yrs ago. I witnessed 3 fights take place right in front of me. I saw a cop get bashed in the head with a glass bottle. No thanks. I'll keep my butt at home. I can play some Soca and dance in my living room.

Blog Catchup

2009-07-22T12:40:00.000+01:00

Wow I really am slacking on this blogging thing. Not that there is much to blog about anyway.

So remember I blogged about having a work experience student come in for 2 weeks. Well he came and he did a good job. He was polite, did what he was asked. Only problem was his punctuality, boy couldn't make it in on time to save his life. But despite that, my boss offered him a summer job. So now he comes in 3 days a week. It's okay, it gives me a little extra help in office when my boss isn't here. And I think the incentive of getting paid has made him get here on time.

I've been sick for the past week, and every time I coughed on the bus, someone gave me a funny look. Swine flu has gotten everyone paranoid. There are so many new cases popping up almost everyday, it's crazy. But so far, me and the fam have been fine. Hopefully it will continue that way.

So flat hunting is a long process. There's not that much out there in my area and within my budget. But now my daughter's father has approached me with a suggestion. He wants to help me buy a place through a shared ownership scheme. Now as nice as that sounds, y'all know I'm suspicious when it comes to him, right? I just think he has an ulterior motive to wanting to help me. Although he says he's doing it to ensure the wellbeing of his daughter, I just don't know. Maybe it's just me, I don't trust people very easily, I always think they have something up their sleeve. I'm not sure what to do. I've always relied on myself to do things and I kinda hate asking for help, but I have learned that sometimes you can't do everything on your own. And even though this would be a huge help, I'm wary. Maybe I just need to talk it out with him and tell him how I'm feeling.

The Speaking of Meems' father. Of the one and a half years she's been going to nursery, he's only been there once since . He didn't bother to help me look for places or go and see any nurseries before she started. The first time he went to her nursery was last month for her parent's day. Now all of a sudden he's trying to tell me that he wants to look into another nursery for her. What's the problem with the current one? I can understand if he has some valid points that he is unhappy with but he doesn't. There's another nursery across the street, and he says he likes them. Has he been to that other nursery to check them out? NO!! Has he been to the current nursery to observe what they do there? NO!! He says he likes the fact that at the other nursery the kids wear uniforms. Meems wears a uniform everyday at her nursery. See if he paid attention, he would see the progress that she has made in the last 1 1/2 years.

Well that's it for now, gotta go do some work.

Another TMI Tuesday

2009-07-07T12:35:00.001+01:00

1. Where was the first place you ever had sex?
My boyfriend's bedroom......during his dad's birthday party.

2. How often do you lie?
I try not to lie very often, unfortunately I'm quite good at it.

3. If you could only be one, would you rather be smart or good looking?
I'd rather be smart.

4. Have you ever passed out or suffered memory loss from drinking too much?
No, I know my limits and I stick to them.

5. Top or bottom?
Depends on the mood. Most times it's top though, I like being in control.

Bonus: Do you have any catalogs for toys/videos/lingerie delivered to your home?
No catalogues. I just go to the store or order them online.

Random Tidbits

2009-07-03T16:00:00.000+01:00

There has been so much death going on recently. It's crazy. Everyday I hear about another person passing away. To all of those who are no longer with us, may your souls rest in peace.

So you know I live with my sister, right? You didn't? Where have you been? Anyway, she devised this cooking rota so everyone has to cook twice a week and we alternate on Sundays. Sounds fine to me. So I have to cook Mondays and Thursdays. So Monday I made BBQ chicken, yellow rice and corn on the cob. Tuesday was my sister's turn to cook. Now if you impose a cooking rota, I figured that means you will actually cook. She "cooked" a frozen pizza. It wasn't like we didn't have food to cook. There is loads of meat in the freezer. The cupboards are stocked with rice and pasta etc. Maybe it's just me. But everyone has made an effort and actually cooked food. She even posted the rota on the fridge, and there are notes: "If you switch days with someone else, please ensure they cook", "If you are going to be home late, make arrangements", and my favourite "Alternate what you cook, don't cook the same thing all the time". When she told us about the rota the first thing her fiance said was "when do you cook?" I was cracking up. We'll see how long this lasts.

Work has been pretty quiet. It has it's moments. I can't complain, at least I'm not stressed out. I've got a work experience student coming to work for two weeks. I interviewed him yesterday, he seems like a nice enough guy. Hopefully he's not gonna take the piss and annoy me. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

My mum and sister are back on speaking terms. Only because my sister wanted my mum to bake some cakes for her office. I knew once one needed something from the other they would start talking again.

Meems is starting into that terrible threes phase. To be honest she already started that when she turned two. The tantrums are crazy. And now she whines when she doesn't get her own way. She'll be playing with a toy and it drops, she starts whining and wants someone else to pick it up for her. Or she'll be watching tv and the program ends and she'll start crying. But she's just like me when I was little. If my mum would hit me I'd get real loud and say "What did you hit me for? Don't you know that hurts?" I didn't care who was around. Meems does that to me. Or she'll go and tell my mum if I told her off. You can't say or do anything in front of this child, she will go and tell your business to everybody. But that's a good thing because if anyone does anything to her, I know she'll tell me.

I am so ready to upgrade my phone. This one is getting on my nerves. I don't know how I lasted so long with it.

Why do people always tell me off for not calling them? What your phone don't work? If you wanted to speak to me then you could call me. If I had something to say to you then I'd call you. I don't like talking on the phone if I don't have something to say. Then they tell me off because I don't leave messages. If it was an important call, then I'll leave a message. If not, then I'd just call you back later. Or they complain because I call them once and if they don't answer, I don't call back. What am I chasing you down for? If I call them 5-6 times then they'd want to say I'm stalking them.

To all my American friends, I hope you have a Happy Independence Day!! Enjoy the weekend.

Laters

Wednesday Weirdness #60

2009-06-24T11:15:00.001+01:00

More randomness. Can you tell I have nothing to do at work today? Wanna play along? Click here

1.) To you, what makes the perfect body the perfect body?
That's hard. I don't have a "perfect body" type. I guess if you're comfortable in your skin then that's all that matters. But I do have a thing for skinny guys, don't know why. Or could it be skinny guys have a thing for me?

2.) What part of your body do you obsess about the most?
I don't obsess about it, I just wish it was a bit flatter. My stomach that is.

3.) What makes a house a warm, welcoming, comfortable home?
The people in it.

4.) What fabric feels sexiest against bare skin?
I'm partial to silk.

5.) What is the lamest lie you have heard in the last month?
My mother lying about having no money when she knows I have access to her bank account and can see all her transactions. She just likes to spend my money instead.

6.) What always makes you feel better when you're upset?
My daughter usually does that. I can't stay upset for long when she's around. Even if she was the one who upset me. Or some cookies and cream ice cream (that's the reason my stomach isn't as flat as I would like it lol)

TMI Tuesday...A Day Late

2009-06-24T10:45:00.000+01:00

1. Would you stay in a loveless relationship for the amazing sex?
I don't see the point in staying in that type of relationship. Sooner or later it will take it's toll on you. But it's easier said that done.

2. If you could only have one, which would you choose: love that lasts forever or great, body numbing sex?
Love that lasts forever. People can get better at sex with some practice and guidance.

3. Looking back at your past loves, which one should you have married/taken back and who should you have tossed earlier than you did?
Looking back, I shouldn't have married any of them. I think they all happened the way they should have.

4. if you had one last fuck in you where, how and who would you “give it” to?
If it's my last one, I'd have to give it to my ex. He knows me and what I like. And I know what I'm getting with him.

5. Which is more important sex, money, love and happiness? (and no, you can’t pick’em all)
I'd say happiness. If I'm not happy with myself, there's no way I'm going to be able to love anyone else. Sex would be meaningless. Money sure as hell wouldn't make me feel any better.

Random Rubbish

2009-06-17T10:30:00.000+01:00

Yeah I've been slacking on my blogging. I won't even use the Twitter excuse, I just haven't had anything to blog about. Here are some randoms anyway:

I'm going to cut my hair. It's not really that long now but it's long enough for me to pull it up in a ponytail. I'm a girl that doesn't really take great care of my hair and it's suffered because if this. So it's getting cut at the end of the month. I wonder how I'll cope when I won't be able to just pull it all back.
I've given up my contact lenses. I tried but I just couldn't get used to them. I think I look better in my glasses anyway.
My mum and sister are still not talking to each other, but that's no surprise.
My boss's wife really is an irritating woman. She can ask the stupidest questions sometimes. And she likes to share a little too much info with me. She's hardly ever here, and when she is she's usually just surfing the net.
Last Thursday was Parents Day at Meems' nursery. I invited her father to come along, as he's never been to the nursery. It went well. She's developing very well and I'm really happy with her progress since she started going there.
Speaking of Meems' father, he's given up on trying to establish a romantic relationship with me. Now he just wants to "make love" to me. WTF?!? He actually said this to me. I'm still in shock. If I don't want a relationship with you what makes you think I want to sleep with you? He must have been high on that stuff.
I'm ready for my next tattoo. They really are addictive. I think I'll do that the same weekend I cut my hair. Come to work on Monday looking totally different. I have an idea of the tattoo I want, but I'm not too sure where to put it. I'll have the guys draw something up for me because I can't draw to save my life.

Wednesday Weirdness #58 Hypotheticals Round 2

2009-06-03T10:45:00.003+01:00

These are some random questions this week

1.) If you had to either shop for your groceries in your underwear only (bra&panties or boxers/briefs/whatever) or run streaking through the mall totally naked for no less than 4 minutes, which will you pick?

I'd go shopping in my underwear. I have cute underwear, I don't mind showing it to everyone in Tesco.

2.) You're having dinner at the inlaws (your boyfriend/girlfriend's parents if not married) and the food is so awful you would rather eat the table cloth. Your mother in law (bf/gf mother) calls you out and asks if there is anything wrong with the food. You can't say you're "just not that hungry" because you had earlier claimed to be "starving" so now, how do you respond to her?

If I have just met them, then I would have to try damn hard to eat the food. I couldn't insult them on our first meeting. If we've known each other a while and I feel comfortable around them, then I'd have to be honest and say I didn't like it, but I'd offer some suggestions on how to make it better.

3.) In the middle of foreplay, your partner asks if you want to try something new. You ask what it is. They want to stick some kind of frozen fruit or vegetable up your anus. How open to trying this are you?

That would just kill the mood for me. I'll try new things but I'm not that open to sticking frozen food anywhere expect inside my mouth.

4.) Would you rather have to walk 30 feet over burning hot coals or walk 70 feet over broken shards of glass? Why?

I'd pick the coals. Not really sure why, but the shards of glass are giving me shivers.

5.) Would you rather have to have sex with your partner with a room full of your former high school classmates watching or have sex with your partner in a room full with a mix of each of your former exes watching?

I'd probably go with the former exes, just so I could show them what they're missing. I'd have to make sure i put on a great performance though.

TMI Tuesday...Dating Edition

2009-06-02T12:20:00.000+01:00

1. What was the last movie you saw on a date?
X-Men Origins: Wolverine Don't know if I would call it a date, but it was fun.

2. What was the last meal you had on a date?
Oh wow, now that was a long time ago, I can't actually remember but I'm sure it was Mexican.

3. When was the last time you made out in the car on a date? More?
I haven't made out in a car since high school.

4. Using a dating websites do you think you are more likely to find a "hook up" or a relationship?
I guess it all depends on what you're looking for. I've heard some success stories about relationships from dating sites. So you never know.

5. Do you have any special "first" date rituals? Flowers, certain restaurant, ect.
Not really. I just try not to be nervous and babble alot.

BONUS QUESTION: Do you believe in sex on the first date? Can a relationship bloom if you have sex on the first date?
Again this depends on the people involved. If you are two consenting adults, I don't see the problem. I've had sex on a first date and had a beautiful 3 1/2 year relationship after that. Whatever floats your boat.

4 Day Weekends Go By So Fast

2009-05-26T13:10:00.000+01:00

I can't believe I'm back at work already. It took all my strength to wake up this morning. But the weekend was great. The weather behaved for once. We had 4 days of warm weather. The sun was shining, everybody was out (with minimal clothing).

Friday, Meems and I skipped school and work and went to see her godmother, it was her birthday. We just chilled at her house and watched tv while Meems ran amok. We stayed there all weekend, I didn't have to lift a finger. Her and her mum were so accommodating. On Saturday we went out and took Meems to the park. She had fun running around everywhere. Sunday we decided to have a picnic. So we packed up our food and went off to the park. It seemed like everyone else had the same idea as well. It was packed, but we found a nice shady spot. We were in the park until after 8pm. And it was still so bright outside. Monday, we went and did some shopping. It was a great relaxing weekend.

So...how was yours?

Another Weird Wednesday

2009-05-20T10:20:00.001+01:00

Wanna play along? Click here to get the questions.

1. If your boss says, "I would like to talk to you about your internet usage" what would your first reaction be?
I'd probably wonder if he's seen my blog. My internet usage isn't so bad, there are no rude or offensive sites. But if he's seen my blog then he'd know what I really thought of him.

2. If you SO asks you "Does this make me look fat?" how do you answer?
My SO would be male, so if he's asking me that question, I'd need to re-evaluate our relationship. But I'd be honest.

3. What is one thing that you pay for, but resent having to do so?
Everything, I'm cheap. But probably my travel card, that's £82.00 a month.

4. A day is being created in honor of you. How should we celebrate it?
Sleep late. Then throw a huge BBQ with lots of friends and lots of food and drink. And just party the whole day away.

5. What CD or Album in your music collection do you secretly enjoy, but would be embarrassed if others heard you grooving to it?
I'm not much of a music buff so my music collection is quite small, but my collection doesn't embarrass me. But it does embarrass my sister. She was shocked that I had both of Busted's albums and knew all the songs.

6. How long do you think you would last if you were a contestant on Survivor?
I guess if no one messed with me then I could last a while. But I tend to be antisocial, so I'd probably separate myself from the group. And if anyone came at me the wrong way, then there would be a fight.

Caught In The Middle

2009-05-19T11:45:00.000+01:00

I have posted previously about the strained relationships between my family members. About the numerous bust ups between my mum and sister. Well there was another one last Friday. I better go back and explain from the beginning.

Remember I mentioned the Autism Clinic my sister went to and the tests that we have to get done for my nephew? Well these tests are quite expensive (one of them was £300), so my sister has been working 7 days a week to get overtime. Now when she works on weekends, she doesn't come home. I guess she stays at a friends house. My mum thinks she out gallivanting and not taking care of her responsibilities. Mum says why can't she come home at night and leave for work from home. Good question but I don't know the answer and I'm not gonna ask either.

So on Friday when my nephew arrived at my mums house after school, he wasn't feeling well. He was being sick, among other things. So my mum tried to call my sister, but she couldn't get her. So she calls me and starts yelling about how my nephew has been sick all over the place and she doesn't have any clean clothes for him and my sister won't answer the phone. So I call my sister, but couldn't get her, so I call his dad. He goes to get him. Later Friday evening I hear that my mum left a stinking message on my sister's voicemail saying that "She's full of shit". She said that whenever my nephew is sick, my sister is nowhere to be found. She said my sister only has one son and regardless of his illness he is hers and she needs to sort herself out. I heard the message this morning and my mum was going on and on, yelling and swearing. It was crazy. It upset my sister so much, she called her dad, while he was away in Thailand. So obviously they are not talking. But everyone is telling me their side of the story.

I never choose sides in their arguments but I do feel that my mum could have handled the situation a bit better. I understand her frustration, I don't see why my sister can't come home on weekends after work, but frankly it's none of my business. She's a grown woman. So my mum should have just let that go. My mum has no people skills what so ever. She doesn't know how to speak to people. If you don't agree with her, then you are wrong. She shouldn't have said what she said to my sister, but unfortunately we're used to it. My sister has to put up with mum because she's looking after my nephew. And my mum milks that for all it's worth.

I feel for my sister, because I know what mum is like. She'll do something for you, but she always has an ulterior motive. She never does anything without thinking what's in it for her. That was one of the main reasons I put Meems in nursery. I could have easily let my mum continue to watch her and save £140 a week, but mum always wanted something in return. Or if there was a disagreement, she wouldn't watch the kids. Or she'd complain that she couldn't do anything because she had the kids, or that they were messing up her house. Unfortunately there aren't any after school provisions for kids like my nephew in our area, so my sister has no choice but to rely on my mum.

Isn't my family great!!

My Life Is Random

2009-05-13T12:55:00.000+01:00

So the trip to the circus last week was eventful. First the weather was ridiculous and rained all morning. We were supposed to eat our lunch on the grass before going into the big tent; but because of the rain we had to eat on the bus. My nephew is a fussy eater and will only eat certain things. That day it was chicken wings. Unfortunately they finished a little sooner than he would have liked and that sparked a tantrum. He started kicking and screaming. It took me and his teacher to restrain him. He hit her in the chest and bit me on the arm. He then threw himself onto the floor of the bus. Finally we managed to calm him down and we all proceeded to our seats. Once inside I calmed him by giving him one of his snacks. But once the chocolate was done we had another tantrum. We had to take him outside until he cooled down. Then we went back inside. He sat through 40 mins of the circus. I didn't think he would have sat for that long. He did really well. But then something sparked him off about 10 minutes before we were ready to leave. So I just took him back to the bus. Besides the tantrums it wasn't too bad of a trip.

I mentioned previously that my sister had the appointment with the Autism clinic. Well there are some tests that we are going to have to do on my nephew to see what his body is lacking and how to proceed with him. There are about 4-5 tests we have to get done and send off to the lab and a few we have to do ourselves and send the results to the clinic. We plan to get them done this weekend as they all seem to require bodily fluids. Oh yeah this could get messy. But if it will help him, then I'll help anyway I can.

I'm still looking for a new place. Unfortunately all the properties in my area are a bit out of my budget. There are some great properties that are within my budget but they are on the other side of the city. So I'm thinking that maybe I need to start looking outside the box. I mean, as long as I can travel to work with a reasonable commute, why shouldn't I move elsewhere. Since I moved back to England, I've lived in the same area. I haven't branched out. Maybe it is time. Besides, I think it will do me good to put a little space between me and my family. I have to send a special to thank you to Tom Gurl for all her help recently. She's the one who told me about the properties. So hopefully I should have a "I've Finally Moved" post soon.

Work is still busy, but people aren't panicking about the "Flu" so much anymore.

Random Rubbish

2009-05-07T13:15:00.001+01:00

The problem with having a four day weekend, is the backlog of work waiting for you when you return. How is it that when I'm alone in the office, all the voice mails get checked, but when my boss is alone they would stay on there until I check them. When I came back on Tuesday, there were messages from Friday morning. WTF?? You mean throughout the course of the day you couldn't check them at all?

Sw.ine flu has kept me busy at work. I've got clients who were supposed to be travelling to Mex.ico and now can't go. I've clients due to travel to the states but are worried about contracting the illness. My phone is always ringing. And not all of my clients are happy with my response.

This past weekend was pretty quiet. I went to see X-Men Origins: Wolverine Saturday night. I loved it. I took Meems to visit her godmother on Monday. She had just come out of hospital following surgery, so we went to see how she was doing. It was great I hadn't seen her in a while. On the way home I almost had an altercation with some stupid people on the bus. Granted, I probably could have made an effort to accommodate them but they made the mistake of trying to yell at me, so then I just got ignorant. They're lucky that there were children there or else there would have been problems. I'm a reasonable person, if you come at me the right way, then everything is cool. But start shouting and trying to gang up on me will just piss me off.

My sister had an appointment with an Autism clinic last week. It went pretty well. They seemed to have put some of her worries about my nephew at rest. They are going to change his diet and put him on some supplements to detox his body. Apparently he has a lot of toxins in his system and he has a few vitamin deficiencies. I hope this will work for him, my sister seems very positive and that's a good sign.

Speaking of my nephew, I'm volunteering for a school trip he has tomorrow to the circus. This is the second trip I've volunteered for . Their first trip was to a museum, but it was pretty boring. The kids didn't really like it, there wasn't really much they could do. It didn't really capture their attention. Hopefully the circus will be better.

Mother nature is going through some serious mood swings. The weather seems to change every hour. The day would start out warm and sunny and then it just clouds over and gets cold. Is it winter or is it spring? Please pick one.

TMI Tuesday

2009-04-28T10:00:00.000+01:00

1. Have you ever had angry sex?
Ummm...No

2. Pity sex?
Can't say that I have.

3. "Oh well, I might as well" sex?
Yes a few times. lol Hey I had nothing better to do.

4. One-of-you-knew-it-was-goodbye-and-the-other-didn't sex?
Yeah the last time with my ex, but I guess he didn't get the memo.

5. Don't-remember-having-it sex?
My memory isn't that bad.

6. Regret-it-afterward sex?
Unfortunately yes.

7. Can't-remember-his/her-name sex?
I remember all their names. There aren't that many names to remember anyway.

8. Never-knew-his/her-name sex?
I knew all their names. Maybe not their surnames but definitely the first name.

Bonus: What was the worst single sexual experience of your life?
I haven't really had any horrible sexual experiences. There was the time my boyfriend's little sister walked in on us while I was...lets just say I was doing something she didn't need to see.

Random Rubbish

2009-04-23T10:01:00.006+01:00

I'm getting real lazy with my blogging. Well maybe not lazy, just been a bit busy with work and the kid. Nothing much has been happening anyway.

My boss's wife hardly ever does any work. It is crazy. She spends most of the day on the internet searching for stuff. First it was for a buggy board, then a tankini, and now garden furniture. And when she can't find something, she asks me to help. What do I look like? I have work to do, dammit.

I'm trying to get used to my new contact lenses, but they just seem like too much work. When I take my glasses off they go in the case and that's it. But I gotta clean my lenses and soak in solution, every time. I know I'm just being lazy. But I am starting to miss my glasses. I think because I've hidden behind them for so long (about 15yrs). I think I look funny without them but everyone says otherwise. So I guess I'll stick it out a little longer.

Meems is becoming a little terror. She answers back and has now started to suck her teeth at me. Her tantrums are ridiculous as well. Oh the joys of raising a toddler. But she's not all bad. She's a bright little girl. People are shocked when I tell them she is only two. She's quite tall for her age. She only has to hear something once and she remembers it. I have to be very careful what I say around her. Unfortunately my sister isn't so careful and has taught her to curse. I told them both when Meems gets popped for cursing she can thank her aunt.

For some reason, my ex-boyfriend has been contacting me lately. I hadn't spoken to him for over 6 months following a misunderstanding. Then all of a sudden he called me. And he's been trying to see me. I guess he must be bored or he thinks he can get some, but it ain't happening. So he needs to stop wasting his breath. He needs to concentrate on his wife and daughter. I am nobody's side piece.

See like I said, not much happening.

My First Wednesday Weirdness

2009-04-08T16:00:00.000+01:00

I'm bored and have nothing else to do. Wanna play along? Click here for the questions

1.) What condiment goes best with french fries?
Garlic mayonnaise. I absolutely love it. But I do keep gum handy for after.

2.) What condiment do you feel best represents your personality?
BBQ sauce. Sweet and spicy

3.) If the love of your life was a different religion from you, would you convert for them if they asked you to?
No. I had this happen once. Well I wouldn't say he was the love of my life but I loved him. He decided to change religions but I wouldn't so we kinda drifted apart after that.

4.) What is your favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?
Strawberry jam. We hardly find grape jam in the UK.

5.) If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
No

6.) If you could change your eye color to anything in the world you wanted, what would you change it to?
I like my eye colour but just for kicks I'd change it to grey.

7.) Are you more often the partner in crime or the good conscience with your friends and family?
It depends. If it's harmless fun then I'm the partner in crime (or the one instigating the whole thing).

Another TMI Tuesday

2009-04-07T13:20:00.005+01:00

I keep forgetting to link the website for TMI Tuesday. So if you wanna play along click here.

Now on to this week's questions:

1. Have you ever had a sexual experience with the ~~opposite~~ same sex?
Not really. I've kissed a girl before...does that count?

2. When you see someone you like, how do you act, how do you get their attention?
It depends on what mood I'm in. I'm normally shy, so I tend to wait for people to approach me. But that can change if I've had a drink, I get a little brave. So I may just come right out and say it.

3. Dominate or dominated, which do you prefer?
I don't know. I have my moments where I like to be dominated and then sometimes I like to take control. But I think I like to dominate a bit more.

4. Would you/ Have you ever had a threesome?
I've never had a threesome, but I did discuss the idea once with my boyfriend (at the time).

5. When was the last time you had sex?
A looong time ago. No, I'm just kidding. About 3 weeks ago.

6. Sex on the first date...good or bad?
Hey if you are two consenting adults.......that's your business.

7. Do you have any random or out of the ordinary turn ons?
Ummm not really.

8. What attributes attract you to a potential partner.
I can be pretty goofy, so a sense of humour attracts me. Someone I can hold a conversation with. Someone who knows what they want and has goals to get it. Someone who is confident but not arrogant. Oh and if he can give a good massage then he's a keeper. I tend to go for tall skinny guys as well.

Please Don't Tell Me...Cause I Don't Wanna Know

2009-04-02T12:15:00.000+01:00

Excuse me while I rant for a bit.

I figured that if you lived with someone and you broke up, one of you would move out. What? Am I talking crazy? Isn't it just gonna confuse things if you are still living together and sharing a bed. Or maybe you're trying to keep your options open.

Well only the two of you know what is going on, but to the outside world it looks like you two are still engaged. If you are unhappy in the relationship then it would make sense to either speak to your fiance and try to work it out or just call it a day. What you shouldn't do is try to spark a new relationship with someone else. That's called cheating!!! And I think that's unacceptable. And I don't want you coming to me and telling me your problems because you aren't going to like what I have to say. This isn't the first time you've done some bullshyt like this. Look what happened the last time. You weren't happy and instead of dealing with your problem at home, you went to someone else. Did you leave your fiance and go off with this other person? No, you decided to stick it out, but not before having an affair with this other fool. Then what happens, you call off the affair and suddenly you have a stalker. You put yourself and the lives of your family in danger because you couldn't make up your mind about who you wanted to be with.

But that didn't stop you from having other affairs and then coming and telling me about it. Do you know that I have lost all respect for you? I would have respected you more if you were just honest. If you don't want to be with HIM anymore then just say so and put everyone out of their misery. You're gonna fu*k around and get yourself in some serious shyt. Yesterday you told me about an incident with your "side piece". About how he was jealous and when you went to see him he was drunk. You had a little tiff and when you went to leave he grabbed you and forced you back into the house. So you don't even pick "sane" guys to cheat with, you go for the dudes with issues. This is the type of person you want to bring around your son?

You really need to sort yourself out. I'm tired of this crap and you coming to me for advice. You are the older one, you should know better. You really just need to make a decision. This isn't just about you, there are other people that will be affected by your actions, namely your son. Would you be okay knowing that a woman was treating your child the way you treat his father? Would that seem fair to you? Seriously you need to make a decision and quick. Before shit gets out of hand.

*End of rant*

What Had Happened Was...

2009-03-24T14:16:00.000Z

So this weekend was spent at home doing absolutely nothing. Meems wasn't feeling very well so we stayed indoors. And for some reason my voice went on Friday so I sounded like a raspy smoker.

Sunday was Mother's Day here in the UK. Didn't do anything special for it. Since Meems wasn't well I didn't go to see my mum. She made a big song and dance about it. But she could have come and seen me, but she didn't.

Work has been picking up lately. I guess that's a good thing. Keeps me busy. My boss's wife has been doing better. She doesn't panic as much now. She can hold her own. But she shares way too much info with me. Anything that's wrong with her she feels the need to share. Then she asks some dumb questions sometimes. I don't know everything, if you want to find something out look it up.

Meems has started to notice that people come in different colours. Before she may see someone on the train and would ask me "Momma, what's the man doing?" Now it's "Momma, what's the white man doing?" So I asked her what colour is mommy? She said brown. Okay so I asked her what colour is she? She said white. Yeah WHITE. Now she's only two and she is of "high yella" complexion so I guess to her she looks white. But when I told her she was brown, she flipped. She started yelling, "NO!! I'm white." Seeing as she's two I won't push it too much, I'll just keep gently reminding her that she's "brown". I must check with nursery to see if they've been teaching them about different races, because I've never addressed that with her.

Speaking of Meems, her dad is starting to irritate me. He always seems to have some excuse when it comes to seeing her. He's either too busy working on his house, or too tired from work. He had to bring me some money on Sunday, and he asked me to come outside. I figured maybe he was on his way somewhere and couldn't stop long. But he had me outside talking for ages. I asked him if he wanted to come inside and see Meems. He told me that he doesn't feel comfortable in the house and that's why he hasn't come back to see her in three weeks. WTF? So I asked what the problem was. Apparently I put off bad vibes or something. Now I'm not rude to this man. I have never once told him that he couldn't come see his child. When he comes over I'm polite, I make small talk. But I guess I'm not nice enough to him. So I said, if that was the case, you could have come to me and said something sooner. Or you could pick her up and take her to your house. He had no response for that. The thing that kills me is he always has an excuse. He'll say he's coming on Saturday and not show up. He doesn't call to say he can't make it. And when I try to call him, he doesn't answer the phone. Now I can be ignorant at times but I hold it back when dealing with him because he's not gonna use me as an excuse. He can't say that I'm stopping him from seeing his daughter. So instead of blowing up at him like I wanted to do, I apologised and said that I'll try harder. If he made more of an effort then maybe things would be different but he doesn't so they aren't.

TMI Tuesday... Secret Edition

2009-03-17T10:08:00.003Z

1. Don't tell us what it is, but do you have a sexual secret you have never told anyone?
I sure do, if I told people then it wouldn't be a secret.

2. Do you have a nonsexual secret you have never told anyone?
Yes, I'm a very secretive person, so there's a lot even my family don't know about me.

3. Did you ever tell someone a secret only to have them spill it? What were the repercussions?
That's the reason I'm so secretive now. People have big mouths. It didn't really have any serious repercussions for me, but that person lost me trust and have yet to gain it back.

4. Did you ever spill a secret someone told you? What were the repercussions?
I haven't, I'm quite good at keeping secrets. That's probably why people like to tell me things.

5. Tell us a secret someone told you, however along ago, that you've never told. (You can disguise name or details)
Didn't I just tell you I'm good at keeping secrets? I'm not telling.

My Weekend

2009-03-16T12:50:00.000Z

I actually had a great weekend. I chilled at home on Saturday, cleaning and doing laundry. I did my mum's hair as well. Then I hung out with J on Saturday night watching DVDs.

On Sunday I went to the International Food & Drink Event 2009 with my mum and cousin. It was great. There were foods from all over the world. Most of it tasted good too. There was no reason to even stop for lunch, every stall had something for you to sample. I sampled a bit too much alcohol though. Hey it was free, I couldn't resist. My mum made some new contacts for her catering business. And I found a retailer that sold American food stuff. So now I have a place to get all the stuff I miss from America. They had everything, I spent most of the time in that stall.

My sister has an appointment with the mental health department about my nephew today. I hope they'll be able to tell her something that will help him. We'll see how it goes.

TMI Tuesday.......on Tuesday

2009-03-10T13:00:00.001Z

1. Are you pro-marriage? Why or why not?
Hey if you want to get married then that's your decision. I wouldn't say I'm against marriage. I'd love to settle down with one person and have a family. But I'm not going to stress the idea, if it happens it happens.

2. Have you ever invented or thought you invented a sexual position?
Not that I'm aware of.

3. Do you like to be tied up? Always or sometimes?
I don't mind being tied up, not all the time but it's good to switch things up every now and again.

4. Do you consider online cybering adultery?
Ummm.... I'm not too sure on this one. Since you're not physically doing anything with another person then technically you're not cheating. But if you have to do that to get your rocks off then there is something wrong in your relationship.

5. Do you prefer masturbation over real sex?
While masturbation is great, I don't prefer it to real sex. There are some things I can't exactly do myself.

6. Do you want sex more times a day than your partner?
It depends on the day.

7. Do you get offended when you partner openly flirts with others or are you okay with it?
If you're gonna do it in my face then we have a problem. Everyone flirts but openly flirting while your partner is right there is just rude.

8. Do you think you're flirty by nature?
I'll admit it I am a flirt. I can't help it.

Random Rubbish

2009-03-06T12:30:00.000Z

I knew having my boss's wife in the office was going to be "interesting". He actually went off on her yesterday. I tried so hard not to laugh, it got so bad I had to leave the office. It wasn't even that serious that he needed to react that way. This is not going to last long.

Since my boss's wife started working here, there have been a few changes: new desks, new computer monitors, new desk accessories, new printer etc. Now my boss is on a cleanliness kick. Mind you, our office is never messy, but now he is stressing that he wants everything nice and neat. The messiest thing in our office is his desk. He has paperwork everywhere, it gets so bad he can never find anything. And yet he's trying to tell me to clear the one stack of paperwork on my desk. My paperwork is in one neat stack in a tray on the corner of my desk. I know where all my things are. My desk is fine, worry about clearing your shit and leave me to it.

Flat hunting is getting on my nerves. Just when I think I'm getting somewhere something happens and screws everything up. But I haven't lost faith, I know I will find the right place soon.

My nephew's tantrums are getting worse now. The other day he got upset at my mum's house and wrecked her living room. He broke this massive glass vase, threw her plants all over the place and broke her glasses. He's getting extremely violent and aggressive. He even hit his father in the eye when he was getting him ready for school. He's been having "outbursts" at school that last for 45 minutes at a time. They have an appointment next week with the mental health department, so we'll see how it goes. I know they don't want to have to medicate him, so hopefully we can find another solution. That's another reason I want to move out as soon as, Meems doesn't need to be around that.

A kid at Meems' nursery has Measles. So all the parents are on alert and keeping an eye out for symptoms. So far she seems alright. Hopefully she'll be okay, she's had her first MMR vaccine and the next one isn't due until she's 3.

My mum's diabetes seems to be wreaking havoc on her eyes. She's found out her left eye is bleeding in the back. She has to go for a retina scan next month, hopefully it is something treatable.

Gotta get back to work.

TMI Tuesday......On Wednesday

2009-03-04T10:35:00.000Z

I was going to do this yesterday, but I got caught up with work and forgot. Oh well, better late than never, right?

1. Is there a sexual act/position/practice that you were sure in advance you would hate (or never try) and then discovered to your surprise you loved?
I'll be honest, oral. I didn't think I would like it, and I swore I'd never do it. But my boyfriend at the time convinced me to try it and surprisingly it wasn't as bad as I thought. Now.... okay I think I'll stop there, this answer may be a bit too TMI.

2. Is there a sexual act/position/practice that proved a lot less interesting in practice than you thought it would be beforehand?
Not really. Everything that I have tried, hasn't disappointed me yet.

3. How do you let your significant other know you're in the mood? How do you let a new person in your life know?
A few subtle hints. Maybe a change of wardrobe. A few well placed kisses, some touching. Or I may just say it. That has gotten a reaction out of people before.

4. How does your significant other let you know he/she is in the mood?
Deep kisses, some groping, soft music.

5. Is there one that got away - a sexual opportunity you didn't realise was one at the time, or weren't ready for and regret missing ever since?
Umm....... Not really. People weren't exactly throwing themselves at me. And if I didn't do it at the time, I had a good reason so I don't regret it. Now there are some sexual opportunities, I wished I did pass on, but that's a whole different post.

I'm Still Here.....

2009-02-25T13:52:00.005Z

I can't believe I haven't posted for 3 weeks. Well I can, I've just been really busy.

Flat hunting is stressful business. Hopefully I should be moving in the next couple weeks. As long as everything goes to plan with no hiccups. Y'all may need to pray for me.

I can't wait to move. My sister is driving me crazy!! She just goes into my room and takes my stuff without asking. A couple weeks ago I spent the weekend at my mums house. When I got home on Sunday I saw that my gray trousers were on the banister (this is where my sister puts her work clothes the night before). I'm thinking I know I didn't leave them there. The next morning she comes in my room early in the morning and tells me "Oh I borrowed your trousers". She didn't ask, she didn't know if I wanted to wear them. Now if I went into her room and took something of hers she'd flip. She couldn't find a sweater and came accusing me of taking it (it was in the wash). Besides wearing my clothes, she uses all my toiletries. She says the carrot oil I use in my hair is too heavy for her, but she is constantly using it. It's almost finished and she has never bought one back for me yet. This is what you get when you live with other people. I just can't wait to be out of there.

Work is picking up now. My boss's wife now comes in three days a week. She is doing okay. She's a bit slow on the computer but she's getting there. She does talk alot though. I know we work together but I don't need to know all your business. It's funny watching her and my boss. My boss is a bully. He seems to lose his temper with her too quickly. She's been learning to do the medical screenings and sometimes takes longer than we would. Sometimes she panics a bit, when she can't get something right. It's like he expects her to be able to do everything straight away. So when she has trouble, the way he speaks to her just makes the matter worse. It's amusing. As long as I don't get caught in the middle.

My Weekend/Week So Far

2009-02-04T16:00:00.000Z

Well let's start with Friday: My boss's wife is coming into the office to help out. So she came in on Friday and I trained her a little in how we do things. She was here for maybe 3 hours. In the space of that time my office changed. We both got new desks, which isn't a bad thing. My desk is now bigger and I got a wireless keyboard and mouse. We ordered a new printer and some other office supplies. I guess having your wife in the office makes you spend money.

Saturday: I have been flat hunting. It can be very stressful at times. But I saw a nice flat on Saturday that I think would be great for me and Meems. It's a one bedroom, gotta stay within my budget for now. But it's big. Hopefully everything will go well and I'll get it.

Sunday: I ventured out in the cold to get a new pushchair for Meems. The old one broke on me a couple weeks ago. Luckily I found one on sale. Other than that I had a pretty chilled weekend.

Monday: I didn't go to work. I couldn't. It started snowing Sunday night and didn't really stop until Monday night. So the whole of London was shut down. The entire bus network was suspended and most of the trains. So I couldn't go anywhere. I wasn't complaining though. I took Meems out in the snow and she loved it.

I never did understand how this country just shuts down after some snow. You'd think we would be used to it and know how to handle it. They knew it was going to snow like a week before, so they should have prepared in advance.

Even though, people were advised not to go out in this weather, my sister drove to work. And what happened? She had a car accident. Someone ran into the back of her car, which made her go forward and run into the back of another car. Her car isn't totaled but it is banged up. She wasn't hurt too bad, she has whiplash though.

Tuesday: The buses were running again, so I went to work. There was ice everywhere. It was a struggle to just stay upright. I was slip sliding all over the place. Luckily I didn't bust my ass.

Wednesday: My boss's wife came in today, but I was still training her. She asks alot of questions. I can't wait for her to actually start doing some work.

13 People Who Share My Birthday

2009-01-29T09:00:00.000Z

Here's my eighth edition of T13.

In case you were wondering my birthday is October 15.

Emeril Lagasse - Chef (One of my favourites)
Eric Benet - Singer
Ginuwine - Singer
Keyshia Cole - Singer
Sarah Feguson - AKA "Fergie" Duchess of York
Toriano (Tito) Jackson - Singer
Mario Puzo - Author
Tanya Roberts - Actress
Vincent Martella - Actor
Paul Robinson - English Footballer (goal keeper)
Andy Cole - retired English Footballer
Dominic West - Actor
Prince Christian of Denmark - member of the Danish Royal Family

TMI Tuesday....Movie Edition

2009-01-27T13:25:00.000Z

1. What was the last movie you saw in a theater?
Seven Pounds. I loved it.

2. What is your favorite movie theater snack?
Sweet popcorn, Peanut M&Ms, and Ice Cream

3. Have you ever snuck in 'outside' food into a theater?
We used to do that when we were younger. In high school, there would be a group of us and the girls would have big handbags and all the food was hidden inside. Hey movie theatre food is expensive.

4. Have you ever made out in a theater?
Not since high school.

5. What is the 'farthest' you have gone in a theater?
Well I haven't had sex in a movie theatre. I'll leave it at that.

Bonus (as in optional): What is one of your favorite movie sex scene?
Probably the sex scene in Monster's Ball.

Interview Me Part 2

2009-01-22T10:10:00.000Z

I won't bother posting the rules again. ~~I'm too lazy~~ If you want to know what they are please click here

This time I was interviewed by Ms. Behaving.

1. At what point [in your pregnancy] did you find out you were expecting?? How did you feel about it??
I was about 4-5 weeks along. I was on holiday in Barbados with my mum. My last few days there, I started feeling ill, and I was eating bananas. (I hate bananas!) My mum said I was pregnant, but I didn't believe her. The day my plane landed back in London I went to the chemist and bought a test. I was scared at first. 1) Because I didn't know who the father was. (I'm being honest. But it wasn't a "Maury" scenario) 2) Because I didn't know how my family would react. But after speaking to the two potential fathers I made the decision to keep my baby and I was quite excited about it. Until the morning sickness kicked in.

2. Do you have any hobbies?? If so, what are they??
I like to write poetry sometimes. I have a book full of poems I've written since middle school. I also like to cook, even though I only really get to cook on weekends. I also like reading crime novels.

3. If you could change anything about yourself [physically] what would it be?? Why??
I'd probably tone up my stomach. It's looking a bit flabby and I can't blame it on the baby anymore.

4. What are your thoughts on interracial dating??
I've been in an interracial relationship before so I don't mind them at all. I say if you are attracted to someone go for it, no matter what their race. Besides my brother seems to only date white women, so I've gotten used to the idea.

5. If guaranteed that it would come true, what is the one thing you would wish for??
This is gonna sound selfish but I'd really like to just be debt free. I made alot of mistakes when I was younger when it came to money and credit. And although I've learned my lesson, I'm still paying for those mistakes.

Interview Me

2009-01-20T11:25:00.000Z

So yesterday I read Organized Noise's "Interview me" post and asked to be interviewed myself. Below are my five questions. Before I answer them, I have to post the rules:

1. If you want to participate, leave me a comment saying, “Interview me" (and please leave your e-mail address).

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Okay on to the interview:

1. You've been blogging for almost two years now. What has blogging done for you during that time? What keeps you blogging?
In real life I'm a really secretive person. I tend to bottle things up inside and not express myself. This blog has been an outlet for me, to just get things off of my chest. It's helped me to open up more. There's something about spilling your soul to complete strangers that is quite liberating. I keep blogging because I need something to do at work. No, seriously it's just a great way for me to express myself and sometimes get some unbiased advice. I have trust issues with my family, so I don't like talking to them most of the time.

2. How many bloggers do you keep in touch with outside of the blogosphere? Who has been the coolest?
I keep in touch with about 4 bloggers on Face.book. I haven't had the pleasure of meeting any in person though. They are all cool. There are different things I like about them all.

3. You've been back in London for 8 years now. Would anything make you want to move back to the United States?
I wanted to move back to the States the minute my plane landed at Heathrow Airport. I still want to move back. I think I have just gotten comfortable here, that and the fact I hate moving. But I'd like to think that in the future I would make my return to the U.S.

4. Have you had/would you ever have a one night stand? (if so, please elaborate)
Yeah I'd have a one night stand. Hey, I'm single. As long as I protected myself and was comfortable with the situation then I don't see the problem. I haven't had a one night stand before. Well what do you define as a one night stand? You have sex once and then never see the person again? Well in that case NO. I only had sex with my daughter's father once but look where that got me.

5. Which blogger(s) would you like to meet and why?
I'd like to meet them all. But I'd really love to meet Darius. He seems like a cool guy, he has a great sense of humour and he cooks. I'm getting tired of looking at his food through a computer screen.

That's the end of my interview. If you'd like to be interviewed as well. Just leave me a comment with your email address and I'll start asking questions.

Laters.

Thursday 13 #7

2009-01-15T12:00:00.003Z

I must admit I have been slacking on my T13s.

This is a list of some of the programmes I am forced to watch by my two year old. Now I don't want you to think she just sits around watching TV all the time. Truth be told she likes to read more than watch TV.

Anyway here's the list of my torture:

Mickey Mouse Clubhouse

Handy Manny

My Friends Tigger & Pooh

The Doodlebops

Imagination Movers

Roary The Racing Car

Fifi & The Flowertots

Harry & His Bucket Full Of Dinosaurs

The Mr. Men Show
Higglytown Heroes

Little Einsteins
Jojo's Circus
Peppa Pig

Wanna see more Thursday Thirteeners, then click here.

You Done Did It Now

2009-01-12T16:35:00.003Z

So this weekend was filled with some drama. Luckily it had nothing to do with me. Y'all remember TDN. My sister's friend from high school who came over here to study and was staying with us? Well she moved out just before Christmas. But when she first came over my sister got her some mobile broadband so that she'd be able to access the net and do her school work. The mistake my sister made was doing it in her name. Since then my sister has been paying the £20 a month bill. Well on Friday the broadband sent my sister a message saying that she had exceeded the usage limits of the broadband, and that she had an outstanding bill of over £200. Yeah £200! Ain't that some bullshit.

So when my sister found out she tried texting TDN but she didn't respond. She tried calling her but the phone just kept ringing and going to voicemail. She left her several messages but TDN never called back. So yesterday I asked my sister if she heard from TDN. She tells me that TDN sent her an email, stating that the world doesn't revolve around her (my sister) and that my sister and the broadband company can sort it out between themselves. My sister was livid!! She was ready to kick some ass. So since then my sister has cancelled the contract for the broadband, but because she cut the contract short she still has to pay the monthly bill for the entire length of the contract. That's coming up to £500. And these people want to take that out of her account, at the end of the month.

I was surprised my sister even set up the broadband in the first place. I know what she's like when it comes to putting her name on something for other people. She's worked hard to clean up her credit and said she wouldn't ever do that again. But that's what you get for trying to help people. But TDN just better be careful, when it comes to money my sister is no joke. TDN must have forgot she gave me address about a week ago. My sister has no problem driving to Essex to get her money and kick some ass.

Back To Work

2009-01-07T11:25:00.000Z

I hate coming back to work after the Christmas holiday. When I came in on Monday morning I had 135 messages on my voicemail. Of those messages only about 40 of them were people actually saying something.

And now because of new government regulations, the travel agents can't issue the policies themselves. Which is more work for me. We did send them letters back in Oct/Nov 08 telling them about the new regulations but none of them seemed to read the letters. Because they've all been calling me wondering why they can't log into their accounts anymore.

So it is safe to say I'm a little stressed right now. And I've noticed that my boss is starting to irritate me more. Like just now I was doing a screening of a client's medical conditions. And there was something he wanted to know about the process. Instead of waiting till I was done and off the phone, he comes and stands behind me and looks over my shoulder. I HATE when people do that. I have so much work to do and every minute he just keeps interrupting me to do something he can't be bothered to do. Hopefully things will die down in a couple of days and I won't be so stressed, cause right now I feel like exploding.

In other news, my mum went to Bermuda for my cousin's funeral (which was yesterday). I haven't spoken to her since she left so I don't know how it went. I hope everything went alright.

Well I better get back to work before he comes to look over my shoulder again.

First TMI Tuesday of 2009

2009-01-07T10:35:00.001Z

Yeah I know it's Wednesday. I was too busy yesterday to do it. So without further ado.....

'Would you rather...' edition

1. Would you rather be stranded on an island alone or with someone you dislike/don't get along with? I'd rather be alone. I haven't killed anyone yet and I don't want to start now.

2. Would you rather accidentally walk in on your parents having sex or have them walk in on you? If I had to choose, I think I'd rather have them walk in on me. I don't wanna see that.

3. Would you rather be snapped by paparazzi during a nipple slip or while exiting a car with out any underwear?(guys, consider similar circumstances) I'd definitely rather the nipple slip. Can't have the world staring at my "bits".

4. Would you rather not have sex for two years or not be able to use the Internet for two years? Well seeing as I have gone almost two years without sex (and survived it) I'd say sex. Two years without the Internet, I'd be bored to death.

5. Would you rather find true love or 1 million dollars? True love. Hey a million dollars sounds good but I'd pick love. Yeah I'm a sucka.

Bonus (as in optional): If you had to choose *one* sexual position for the rest of your life, what would it be? Why? Oh that's easy. Doggy style. It's my favourite position. Something about the angles just works for me.

So It's Over...

2008-12-29T10:59:00.003Z

Christmas that is. I want to thank you all for your kind words and prayers following the death of my cousin. It was much appreciated.

My Christmas wasn't bad at all. Even though I didn't put up the tree. Don't judge me. We went to my sister's fiance's mums for dinner. It was good. I didn't have to cook or clean up. Great. Meems cleaned up in presents. I don't know where I'm going put all these toys. She enjoyed herself and that's all that matters.

I hope you all had a great Christmas as well.

A Not So Merry Christmas

2008-12-23T11:30:00.000Z

Remember how I said I wasn't really in the holiday spirit but I'd hopefully snap into it. Well there's no hope of that happening now.

I found out yesterday afternoon that my cousin had been in a terrible motorcycle accident on Sunday. He was in a critical condition in hospital in Bermuda. It didn't look good, according to my uncle, his brain was swollen and he was on a respirator. Then we found out last night that he passed away. He was my age. He had a young daughter as well. My uncle is pieces over this. Even though I haven't been in contact with that side of my family for years, it hit me hard. He was a young man with a bright future ahead of him and now he's gone.

It just goes to show that life really is short. We really must live each day to it's fullest.

It really doesn't feel like Christmas anymore.

R.I.P. Andrew. You will surely be missed.

Random Rubbish

2008-12-19T15:05:00.003Z

Thanks to everyone for the well wishes. Meems is feeling alot better. She had the week off of school and stayed with my mum all week. But that also meant I had to stay at my mum's because she wouldn't let me leave without her. I'll tell you this cold is no joke. I can understand now why Meems didn't want to eat. My teeth hurt every time I chew, so I've been reduced to soup. It had me feeling so weak I could barely stand up. But I still went to work. Crazy, right? I know, but as this is my last week before Christmas, I had some things to finish and my boss had appointments out of the office all week, so I couldn't stay home. But today is my last day and I am looking forward to the two week break.

Today is my sister's 33rd birthday. She'd probably be upset if she knew I put her age out there like that. Good thing she doesn't know about my blog. So I'm on babysitting duty tonight while she goes out with T (don't know what to call him now: fiance, baby father). They know they want to be together they just need to grow up.

It has been decided that we are going to have Christmas dinner at T's mum's house. I don't know how that is going to work out, her place isn't that big but we'll work it out. I'm sure I'll have some blogworthy stories about that.

The tree still isn't up. Maybe I'll do that this weekend. Maybe.

I still haven't done any shopping either. That will be done this weekend as well. We already have an understanding that only the kids are getting presents. The grown ups can fend for themselves.

I'm looking forward to seeing what 2009 has to offer. Even though 2008 wasn't so great it was definitely better that 2007. So the only way to go is up.....right?

My Weekend.........

2008-12-15T13:00:00.000Z

was spent watching Playhouse Disney with Meems. The poor thing was sick. On Wednesday I noticed a rash coming up on her skin, so I took her to the doctor Thursday morning. We found out she had an unspecified viral rash. Apparently they are quite common in young kids. So she stayed home from nursery that day. She went in on Friday because it was her Christmas party and she wanted to go. She was pretty fussy all day and didn't want to eat anything. And that's pretty much how she was all weekend. I had to try and force her to eat something. So we sat in front of the TV and watched all her favorite shows. Turns out the virus caused her to catch a very bad cold. Poor thing was coughing all night. And now I seem to have caught it from her. I really do hate being sick.

TDN also moved out on Sunday. Apparently her aunt arranged a room with a friend of hers for her. So she packed up and shipped out early Sunday morning.

Christmas is next week and we haven't even put up any decorations. The tree is just sitting in it's box under the stairs. For some reason I'm not really in the holiday spirit. Maybe I'll snap into it soon.

I Needed Something To Do

2008-12-10T12:00:00.002Z

I was bored so I decided to do this meme I found at Ms. B's spot.

The Rules:
You
Can
Only
Use
One
Word
Answers

Where is your cell phone? Desk
Where is your significant other? Invisible
What's your hair color? Brown
Your mother? Around
Your father? Somewhere
Your favorite thing? Meems
Your dream last night? Nightmare
Your dream/goal? Success
The room you're in? Office
Your hobby? Reading
Your fear? Death
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Employed
Where were you last night? Mum's
What you're not? Rich
One of your wish list items? Camera
Where you grew up? Miami
The last thing you did? Work
What are you wearing? Clothes
Your tv? Small
Your pet? None
Your computer? Useless
Your mood? Hungry
Missing someone? Yep
Your car? None
Something you're not wearing? Hat
Favorite store? Poundland
Your summer? Gone
Love someone? Yep
Your favorite color? Blue
When is the last time you laughed? Morning
Last time you cried? Ages
Are you a b*tch? Sometimes
Favorite position? Nunya
Favorite past time? Cooking
Are you a hater or a lover? Lover
Are you genuine or fake? Genuine
Any vices? Loads
Pro life or wire hanger? Choice
Mccain or Obama? Obama
Pro plastic or natural? Huh?
Dream job? Midwife

Feel free to join in if you like.

Random Rubbish

2008-12-09T16:30:00.000Z

I didn't do much this weekend ~~no surprise there~~. I baked some brownies with my mum. They were good too. I had to do a practice run before I made them for Meems' teachers. Darius gave me the idea to bake them Christmas presents. So I'm making brownies and cookies. Thanks D.

I started typing this post this morning but then I spilt coffee on my keyboard and it went haywire. I'd type the letter "a" but "sa" would show up. I press the up arrow key and "-" would appear. It was pissing me off because I wasn't able to use my computer all day. I told my boss it was messed up and now he's buying me a wireless one. I'm not telling him that it's working again.

My sister and her ~~on/off~~ fiance make me laugh. They know they don't really want to be apart, I just think my sister is trying to scare him straight. There are things that she would like to see him change and I guess it seems like he's not taking that on board so I guess she felt she had to go to extreme measures. Which is fine when there aren't children involved. They are messing with my poor nephew. See my sister leaves for work very early in the morning. So T (fiance) used to get my nephew ready for school. TDN has been doing it since he left. Now there have been times where TDN had to go to school early so she wasn't able to get Dace ready. On those occasions T would sleep over so that he's there in the morning. Now tell me that isn't gonna confuse the kid. One day daddy's here, the next he's not. Dace was used to it being him and his dad in the mornings. This change just threw him off. They know he doesn't deal with change well. They just need to either let it all go or make up. But this in between shit is just crazy. Hell, it's even messing with Meems. Yesterday she just kept asking for her Uncle T all the way home.

I'm walking around here with a busted lip, because last night I smacked myself in the face with the fridge door. Don't ask. I'm just clumsy. It did hurt though. Still does.

Thursday Thirteen #6

2008-12-04T10:00:00.004Z

Today's list is all about Food. Yeah I'm a huge foodie. As much as I love cooking food, I love eating it more. So here are 13 of my favorite foods:

Oxtail - I love oxtail, maybe not as much as my sister but I could definitely eat it every day, especially with some butter beans mixed in.
Curry Goat - I am the deepest curry fiend. Especially with some rice and peas and plantain.
Prawns (shrimp) - I don't really mind how they're cooked. Fried, sauteed in garlic butter or even curried. I just love prawns.
Lamb - I love roast lamb with lots of gravy.
Pork - Could be roast pork, pork chops, bacon, ham, ribs..... I just love pork. I don't think there is anything anyone can say to me to make me stop eating pork. It'll never happen.
Ice Cream - I am addicted to Haagen Dazs Cookies and Cream ice cream. I can eat a whole pint of it in one sitting. That's probably how I put on weight in the first place. LOL
Chocolate - I love chocolate. But only milk chocolate and white chocolate. I can't get down with dark chocolate, it's too bitter for me.
Fried Chicken - But it has to be home made fried chicken. The KFCs over here are just nasty. Chicken is just straight greasy. Besides they don't even have any biscuits and I can't eat KFC without biscuits.
Fruit - I love fruits: strawberries, apples, kiwis, mangoes, watermelon etc.
Cheesecake - I remember when I was pregnant I nagged my mum to make me a cheesecake because I was craving it so much. I could eat it every day and I did for about a month while I was pregnant
Fajitas - I like to buy the kits and make them at home. That way I get to put all sorts of random stuff in them.
Lasagna - I haven't had it in a while but I have been craving some lately. With some home made garlic bread.
Cashew nuts - I spend way too much money on cashew nuts. There's this one particular brand that makes caramelised ones and I just have to have them, whenever I see them.

There's much more but I'll stop now because I'm making myself hungry. You notice there's only one healthy thing in this whole list?

Wanna join the party or check out other Thursday Thirteeners? Click here

Random Rubbish

2008-12-01T16:30:00.001Z

Work has been keeping me busy lately. I guess I shouldn't complain, it stops me from falling asleep at my desk. Since I have nothing of substance to write about here's some random things going on in my part of the world.

I just found out my boss' wife is coming to work with us next year. The company is branching out with new products and we will definitely need the extra staff. But his wife can be overbearing sometimes. I'm used to doing things my way and not having someone breathing down my neck. So we'll see how this works.
My sister and my mum are still not talking to each other. No surprise there. They're both still bad mouthing each other to me though. I just ignore the lot of them.
Meems has become a little chatterbox. The other night she had my sister's cow pencil case and I had to take it away from her. Do you know the next morning, this child was on the phone to my mum telling her that I took the cow away and made her cry. She's there on my phone telling on me. I guess it is a good thing, at least she'll let me know if anyone did anything to her.
I can't believe Christmas is almost here. It's three weeks away. DAMN!! Have I mentioned I haven't done any shopping yet?
Speaking of Christmas, my sister's ~~fiance's~~ ex-fiance's mother has invited us over for Christmas dinner. It could be wierd, I'm not sure what I'm going do yet. But I can't just say no, she's family. No really, his mum is my cousin. ~~Barbados sure is a small azz island.~~
It has gotten so cold over here. I don't do cold. I told ya'll I'm a Miami girl. I'm not really a hat person but I may have to get one, my ears are freezing! Or buy a new coat with a hood. The other weekend I woke up and it was snowing. I'm not built for cold weather.

Well that's it for now. Gotta go get the rugrat.

Happy Thanksgiving

2008-11-27T10:21:00.003Z

Even though I'm in London and we don't celebrate Thanksgiving here, I still wanted to wish everyone a happy thanksgiving. So:

Watch Funny Videos

Yep, It's Tuesday Again.....

2008-11-25T10:59:00.003Z

1. What is your favorite Thanksgiving food?
Don't remind me of Thanksgiving. I'm sad I'm missing out. But it's probably pumpkin pie. I love pie.

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
I don't really pay attention to music too much. And if i don't like an artist I just won't listen to them.

3. You seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy crap, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?
I'm soft, I'd probably spend it on my daughter.

4. What is your favorite curse word?
I curse way too much. My fav would probably be shit.

5. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?
Who the hell is Rufus and where did he get that phone booth from?! I'm not getting in no time-travelling booth with someone I don't know. Besides, there is nothing in my past that I want to revisit, that's why it's the past.

Bonus (as in optional):You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What's it gonna be?
Super power?? I'd like to be able to read people's minds. Then again maybe I wouldn't like what they thought. Ignorance is bliss, after all.