Family Drama

It is safe to say that I don't really communicate with my brother. I rarely call him and he only calls me if he needs something. Whenever something happens between him and his girlfriend they call my mum. And she in turn calls me. Why? I don't know. What exactly does she want me to do about it? My brother is 10 years older than me, he's a grown ass man. He should be able to handle his own shit. I don't want to get involved, but my mum keeps telling me about his drama.

A couple weeks ago he and his girlfriend got into an argument and she threw him out of the house. Apparently the police were called as well. As I wasn't there I can't say what happened but I do know that my brother has been violent with her in the past, so lord only knows what happened this time. So anyway my brother left before the police arrived. So right now I believe the police are looking to "talk" to him. So right now he is renting a room from his friend's dad. Do I feel sorry for him? No I don't. He got himself into that mess. My brother had his own flat. He lived 2 minutes away from his girlfriend's house. They lived on the same street!!!! There was really no reason to give up his flat and move into that girl's house. Then he would start complaining that all his money went to her and she didn't do anything. Well if that was the case then you should have stayed in your own spot. Then they would argue, something would pop off and he'd get flung out. Then they'd make up and do it all over again. Every time something went wrong they'd call my mum and then she'd call me and my sister.

So after this last episode my mum is calling me asking if I've called him and expecting me and my sister to look after him. My sister went and bought him food and stuff. Against my judgment I bought him some new bed linen and stuff. I tried to be nice and call and check on him but he's in this pit of self pity and i can't be bothered anymore. I invited him over for dinner, he didn't come. My sister told me that he's said he's depressed. I can understand he's sad, he and his girlfriend have been together for 7 years. But if he doesn't change his attitude and get some help for his anger they have no chance. But my brother's problem is that he never thinks he's wrong. He always blames it on someone else. Nothing is ever his fault. So I am tired of talking and can't be arsed to chase after him anymore. If he wants to sit around feeling sorry for himself then so be it.

To the outside world, that may seem harsh, but you can't help someone that doesn't want your help.

I'm Around

I know I'm slacking again.

Well since my last post here's what's been going on:

• Three weeks ago I learned that my grandmother (on dad's side) passed away. I wanted to travel to Barbados for the funeral but it wasn't financially possible at the time. My mum, my sister and my dad went. Apparently there was lots of family drama, enough drama to make my sister come home a week early.
• Last week I turned 26. I don't really feel any different. I wasn't really that excited about my birthday this year. I don't know if it was the news about my gran, or that my family wasn't here. But I had a good day anyway. Got taken out to dinner on Saturday night so it was cool.
  
• Got a pay rise at work. Definitely happy about that, especially in this economic climate. The extra money will definitely come in handy. I think my boss is finally starting to realise how valuable I am to this establishment.
  
• Meems' tantrums are still outrageous, but I think she is starting to realise that it's not getting her anywhere. Yesterday she threw a fit because she couldn't call her dad on the phone. He was driving at the time so I told her she couldn't call him at that moment and would have to wait. She started to cry and scream. Did I mention we were at the train station on our way to school? She cried and carried on for the whole 15 minute train ride. Then when we were walking to her school, she turns around and asks me if I'm her friend. I told her no because she was rude to me. She started sulking. Got to school her teachers asked why she looked so sad. She told them that she was rude to me and upset me. So when I was leaving she comes out and gives me a hug and apologises. I couldn't really be mad at her after that.

Temper Tantrums

I have repeatedly been told that I was little terror when I was younger.

Apparently I was brutally honest: a lady came by our house to do my mums hair and she didn't smell quite right. So I made it my duty to ask her if she didn't have a bath that day.

I answered back: I went to a convent school in St. Vincent, so when you got in trouble you would get smacked with the ruler. Apparently I got in trouble and when it was my turn I told the teacher "My aunt says no one is to wash their hands pon me." Well she went back and told my aunt and my aunt said that's right she did tell me that.

I didn't take hints very well: I was out with my mum and misbehaving. So to warn me that I was pushing it, she pinched me. I blurted out (loud as hell) "What did you pinch me for? Don't you know that hurts?"

I get reminded of my bad behaviour almost daily. So it's no surprise ( to everyone but me) that my daughter is a little terror. Like mother like daughter, right? Take yesterday as an example: she got a scooter for her birthday and wanted to ride it to school. I explained to her that she would have to ride it all the way there and that I wouldn't be able to carry her. Maybe it was my fault for trying to reason with a 3 year old? Anyway she was alright riding it from home to the train station. When we got off the train, she didn't want to ride it anymore and she didn't want to walk either. She expected me to carry her. I told her I couldn't carry her, the scooter, her school bag and my bag. She started screaming in the street. I mean top of her lungs screaming. It was deep.

People have told me I have the patience of a saint, when it comes to my daughter. I don't think I do. Trust it does piss me off, but blowing up at her and yelling isn't gonna help the situation. I guess people just deal with things in different ways. She's at that age where she's gonna test boundaries and see how far she push it. But I'm running out of ways to deal with these tantrums. I've ignored her until she's stopped. I've taken away privileges. I've done what I possibly can but they don't seem to be easing. Maybe I'll just have to wait it out.

If anyone has any suggestions, they will be greatly appreciated.

TMI Tuesday After A Long Hiatus

1. Have you used put anything edible on (or in) your partner's body and then eaten it?
Yes. You don't need me to go into detail do you?

2. Have you ever had an AIDS test due to reasonable suspicion or hyperactive imagination?
I have had an AIDS test but not because of any suspicious activity. I just think it's something everyone should do.

3. Have you ever fantasized about someone else other than your partner while you were engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation?
No. If that happens, then I don't need to be having sex with that person.

4. Have you ever engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation while in a moving car? A car being driven by someone not engaged in the sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation?
No can't say that I have.

5. Have you ever had sex so many times or for so long that one or both people involved runs dry?
Yes that has happened before. Not a comfortable situation.

Bonus (as in optional): Name 5 things an unplanned (or planned) visitor would find in your bedroom?
As I have a toddler, everything is hidden in my room. You won't find anything naughty out in the open. So you'd probably find: my bed, my closet, my barbie collection, my daughter's toys, and laundry.

Long Time

This one post a month really needs to stop. I'm going to try to do better.

This past Saturday was Meems' 3rd birthday. I can't believe she is three already. I threw her a little party at McDonalds. Most of her nursery friends came. They all had a great time. I'm really pleased she enjoyed herself. She got spoiled rotten as usual. She got more toys than I have space to store them. I guess it's time to go through the old toys and start giving things away. Overall Saturday was a good day. My mum made her this huge layer cake. I didn't taste any until I got back home, only to realise my mum soaked the chocolate cake in cherry liqueur. She was making another cake for a wedding and must have forgotten to keep Meems cake separate so they all got soaked.

On Sunday I got to hang out with TomGurl. She's cool peoples, she managed to get me out of my comfort zone: North West London. We had lunch and then took Meems to the park. Never again will I get on a roundabout. Meems just walked off like it was nothing. I had to sit for like 5 minutes to get my bearings and even then I was still dizzy. I swear I felt like I was hanging upside down. Yeah, I'll leave that to the kids. I'm an old woman, my body can't take it.

I'm going to my first concert in like 4-5 years. Should it matter that I haven't heard of the artist before? I got people helping me on that. I'll be ready by the time the concert rolls around (next week). I hope.

Not much else is going on in my little world. Family still driving me nuts. But what else is new.